Italian Princess RLM2 Essex's blog: "New Beginnings"

Feeling broken 

Barely holding on

So many feelings to contimplate 

So little strength to fight

 

I'm not done

It's not over with yet

You have yet to see the last of me.

 I have been broken and forced to my knees

Begging for my own breath

I'm on my feet, 

yet still broken, still fighting

 

I know how to hide it well

I was never good enough for some

Thought I was never good enough for much

But you have yet to see who I am

Nor what I am about

 

I know where beauty lies

I have seen it once 

within your eyes

The light I saw blew me away

And here I stand knowing I will fight or walk away

From anything that stands in my way.

 

The truth is never far behind

It always stands and awaits to come out.

If I ran away, I'd never have the strength to go too far

The beating of my heart keeps me going

But I need to be heard and understood.

Not many care enough to stop and listen

hence why so much burns inside of me.

 

I have only one voice

One clear voice

One that so few understand

I have been drowned out so many times

Taken for granted

Left and yet I still stood.

 

I am certian that there is only one path to take

The one that brings me to happiness

You are that path,

Yet you don't listen

And here I kneel praying for you to hear me

I close my eyes and think that if I am very still

You will hear me and come 

 

 

 

 

 

It never matters who is your charge

The one that lost the draw

And has to stand face to face to you

Raging swords

Looking for the kill

Waiting to see 

Where the last sword lands

 

Many come 

Many go

What is it that burns inside of you

What is the legacy?

Are you willing to die

No matter the reason

Always based on faith.

 

I call your name

As I swing my sword

For the very last time

I stand strong

Yet I still fall

 

Send the sign

Say the last goodbye

Immortality is calling me

Yet I will die with honor and pride

 

Raise the sail

Wave goodbye 

Destiny is calling

Lay with the fire burning

With the last sword

Resting for ever

In the hands of the last fight, 

The last sword of the great warrior.

 

Angel of mine

Where did you go?

Are you behind me?

Well that won't do

You are my forever, not yesterday

 

I sit here in wonder

Watching lovers walk past me

Wondering if my angel will walk with me

Enticing lifes desires

Making love under the stars at night

And not caring of nothing at all.

 

Every woman wants to be made love to

In every way there is.

And I want that from my angel

To make love to me

With just his eyes.

 

I will always remember that you love me

Always want to touch myself

Until your gentle touch

Takes me to that wonderful place.

'Til then,

You'll be an angel of mine

And I will rise myself to that place

Only lovers can go

My sweet angel of mine

Take me as I am

There is nothing else I can be

Just me, always me

It was you that opened me up

Wanting to be free of yesterday

Take me as I am

Lay down beside me

Hold me close

Don't let me go

I want to be like that forever,

No where else

 

I have a lot of love

And I don't want have no one to give it to

I believe love can run as deeply

As one allows.

Will you still love me

No matter what?

 

Laying across the bed thinking of you

Twisting my hair with my fingers

Just dreaming of what it would be like

Just feeling free to do whatever I want.

With only you

Nightmares no longer

Stalk in the darkness

Only in my dreams are thoughts

Thoughts of yesterday

Ones that carry no meaning

Just you!

 

I feel you beside me,

Yet I have never met you

Just our chats, our talks.

Hello, I love you

I need you now

Help me through another night

One that lives in paradise!

 

I love you

The way you talk to me

The way you make me feel

The way you make my fantasies

Seem so close to reach

Yet so far until our next talk

Our chat, our hugs

 

I love you

I hope I never disappoint you

I want to be all that you want

One day I will see you

I will hold you in my arms

Wondering if it's for real

Or yet another dream

 

Never doubt how much

I love you!

Everyone at some time in thier lives meet someone new. What that person means or will mean to you will all be understood later down the road. After the talks, the fights, and the meaning that is created in your heart. The beginning is always the most difficult. The questions lurk like demons waiting to pounce on an innocent. Are they liars? Are they playing with me just to score? So many questions for something that could be one of the greatest things to become part of your life. Why are there so many fears and questions when it comes to something new coming into your life? Why does what someone else does to you create this defense mech. that gives you reason to destroy something before it even has a chance to grow and become something worthwhile? Why do things have to be hard? Life should not be this hard! You meet a new person, why does it have to mean they want in your pants and not your heart? Other ppl that hurt you, why do they decide your next experience? How did they get control? Well, with new beginnings comes new experiences. And with faith and hope, new beginnings bring new life to a life that has so much room to grow and become better.