rewindthefuture's blog: "Mad world"

There is a part of me that wants an answer, a part of me that doesn't want to know. A part of you that I am in love with and a part I am willing to let go. This is a delicate unraveling. Now and then I find pieces of the floor. Tiny little bits that tell me maybe I shouldn't take this or love you anymore. Someone is going to have to fess up. Someone is going to have to clean this mess up. Wonder what will make you happy. I wonder what you'll do with it all. I have a map in my hands, but somehow I still don't understand why I have to always miss you. Why I have to make the call. Before you drive me away take a good look at me. Picture me not lying naked on the couch. I wish the best for you every time you go through this before you finally figure it out. I wanted you the first time. I loved you from the second. And I don't know how that ever goes away. As far as I can tell, you're really good at talking. I think it's time you let me know I'm just your latest mistake. Someone is going to have to step up. Someone is going to have to clean this mess up.

So the big V-day is coming up, hope everybody has someone on this day, cause i know i dont really care about this day. I have spent the last4 with someone that i really cared about an thats all i need. It seems that obstacles are thrown in your way to make you stronger. Under a pale grey sky i write this blog looking out my window into the bleekness of the yard. watching the ghosts of my lost love tumble across the grass. But like the grass thats dead to. But day in an day out little by little this feeling leaves me but with it, it takes something that i had faught so hard to gain i used to be the total opposite of what i am now. i was voitile angry an sad at everything but mostly myself. I'm over that now I guess i should be happy cause i loved her, i loved her so much that she wont look at me, talk to me. cause she knows what she did an that she felt something die on the other side of the phone. Well i guess after all you cant change your stars... And watch the Vid its top notch