SexyEyes's blog: "Life"

We live in a society of instant gratification: instant coffee, instant breakfast, instant money from our local ready bank machine--it's everywhere we look!! No wonder so many of us look for instant answers to all our problems. Building trust takes time, change takes time, healing old wounds take time; there are no immediate, ready-made solutions. We all have dark times in our lives, but the journey to better times is often what makes us happier, stronger people. When we stop expecting instant relief, we may come to believe that where we are today is exactly where we should be. "If I am under pressure and setting myself deadlines, I will stop for a few minutes and think of just this one day and what I can do with it."

I WILL NOT BE ON HERE AS MUCH AS I HAVE BEEN. I HAVE CERTAIN THINGS IN MY LIFE THAT I NEED TO DEAL WITH AND WORK ON. I HAVE COME TO REALIZE THAT EVER SINCE MY DIVORCE AND THE RECENT PASSING OF MY EX, I HAVE SLOWLY BEEN GIVING UP ON LIFE. EVERYDAY I SEEM TO CARE LESS AND LESS ABOUT THE THINGS AROUND ME. NOT TO THE POINT THAT I WANT TO DIE OR ANYTHING, JUST NEED TO REFOCUS MY ENERGY ON MAKING BETTER DECISIONS. ONES THAT WONT END UP IN REGRET AND GUILT. I THOUGHT I WAS HANDLING THINGS OK, BUT MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS HAVE SEEN THE CHANGE AND SEE THAT I'M NOT THE HAPPY, OUTGOING PERSON I ONCE WAS AND AS I REFLECT BACK ON MY PAST, I TOO SEE THAT THINGS AREN'T RIGHT. IT'S TIME I QUIT USING THE COMPUTER AS AN ESCAPE AND START LIVING. SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME ON HERE IS KEEPING ME FROM MY MOST IMPORTANT PRIORITIES, NAMELY MYSELF AND MY DAUGHTER. I WILL BE ON FROM TIME TO TIME TO CHECK IN, SO PLEASE DON'T FORGET ABOUT ME AS I SURELY WONT FORGET ANY OF YOU.

Is There A Soul Mate For My Heart Tiny steps I take, with caution and very slow. What directions should I take, where should I go? A love I once had, walked away from my heart. Yes I am scared, once hurt, the steps are hard to start. Is there a Soul mate for my heart, someone true. Could I now be writing about someone like you. Can a broken heart mend, and learn to trust. I sure hope so, as I don’t want it to rust. I long for the feeling, but do I really know. How long does it takes a heart to mend, is it slow? Will the steps I take lead me to love? God will you guide me, looking down from above? What is a Soul mate, I don’t understand. What kind of love is between a woman and a man? Have I missed a true love, or will I find? Someone for my heart, is a Soul mate kind? Lost in love, was this my past? What really happened, why didn’t it last? I do have memories, very good ones too. Can a Soul mate change colors, hopefully not blue? Why do lovers, sometimes play games? They say the wrong things, and call each other names. They hang up the phone, with hurt on their mind. Will a Soul mate always share, and always be kind? I miss the soft touch, the cuddling at night. Will a Soul mate give comfort, as we turn out the light? If I look into their eyes, will they heat up my heart? Will I know if it is true love, from the very start? Is there a Soul mate for my heart, to walk beside me? If there is, will I be the one they always see? Day or night, just walking hand in hand. Will the wind always blow, kissing on the sand? I have always heard, there is a Soul mate for each and everyone. I hope my Soul mate isn’t scared and decides to run. I’d give them my heart for eternity. I hope there is a Soul mate, for someone like me. Mike Cash

There's something in a simple hug That always warms the heart; It welcomes us back home And makes it easier to part. A hug's a way to share the joy And sad times we go through, Or just a way for friends to say They like you 'cause you're you. Hugs are meant for anyone For whom we really care, From your grandma to your neighbour, Or a cuddly teddy bear. A hug is an amazing thing - It's just the perfect way To show the love we're feeling But can't find the words to say. It's funny how a little hug Makes everyone feel good; In every place and language, It's always understood. And hugs don't need new equipment, Special batteries or parts - Just open up your arms And open up your hearts. Jill Wolf

It's Saturday. A picture perfect day here. Beautiful day to be out and about enjoying the sunshine and having some fun. It's 3:00pm and instead, I just woke up from a nap. I had plans for the weekend, but those fell through. Not a major catastrophy but just a little disappointed. So anyways, I figured my daughter and I could go out and have some fun. Maybe go into Branson, have a nice lunch and do some shopping and check out some cool fun places. Well, yesterday started out with a toothache. Luckily that went away. Spent this morning going over my bills and check book and realized I'm broke. So daughter woke up all ready to go out and had to tell her we couldn't. Gas is way to expensive just to drive anywhere. So here I am, stuck at home. Oh well, I guess that's just the way life is sometimes. I try not to let things like this get me down. Afterall, there are people out there worse off than me and with a whole lot worse problems. It just sucks sometimes though. I get tired of being alone and always being broke. Tired of being disappointed all the time. Guess I'm done complaining and feeling sorry for myself for now. Thanks for listening to me vent and if you're reading this, then I guess I'm not the only one home and bored. LOL

I close my eyes and I see you You are close to me, you reach out and embrace me I put my arms around you and feel your closeness I enjoy having you in my arms, enjoy your body next to mine. I kiss you passionately I wake up and find that you are not there It was a dream, so real, so passionate I look forward to sleep again just to dream of you

The more I talk to you The more I like you The more I like you The more I want to be with you The more I want to be with you The more I miss you The more I miss you The more I love you The more I love you The more it hurts I don't have you

Reflections... Words once written On paper browned with time, A mirror to the soul ... A tireless spirit ... Echoing a past forgotten, Hidden deep within ... A door closed, now opened An overflowing dam of thoughts, of feelings ... Words, phrases A living entity ... Proof of one's existence, In a world of unexplained mysteries ...

Gone I held a crystal in my hand, So perfect and sparklingly clear... With a sweep of a hand Broken, shattered into pieces... I held a diamond in my hand, A perfect cut, So beautiful... In an instant, snatched away... I held a rose in my hand, With petals so delicate and fragrance so sweet... Days passed, its petals turned brown One by one, they fell to the ground... Life is consistently inconsistent, Nothing definite... With a snap of a finger, everything stops In a blink of an eye, everything's gone.