Erotica's blog: "just stuff"

HEY EVERYONE!!! I know it has been a while but i just wanted to let everyone know that I am doing much better and I will be back on air starting January 8th! Yes thats right THE ONE AND ONLY NAKED DJ EROTICA comes back on air with BAD SEED RADIO. I have been working there behinde the sences for a while and I am ready to take the air yet again! *kisses and hugs* Erotica

Ok I have come to this decision after much thought and consideration. I am retireing from being a DJ. My Health is fading a lot faster than I would like and I just dont have the energy anymore. I love DJ'ing, but I have to put myself first. Hopefully after a few months I will be able to return to the air waves. I love the friends I have made as a DJ and I hope to keep them as friends. I will continue to support two stations Bad Seed Radio and Club Damage Inc. I love the ppl at both stations very much and I will miss them more than they will know. I wish I didnt have to do this but I feel it is for the best for me. So with that in mind I want to say that I love everyone I have met and who has been a true friend to me and I hope to one day return to the air waves till then I will always be lurking. Love you all, ~*~LIZ~*~EROTICA~*~

I just wanted ya'll to know I am ok still sick and idk when i will be able to return to cherry tap or the station full time. I am doing everything I can to get better. I love you all!!! Mwah!!!!!!!

Well everyone I wont be online as much as I usually am for about a week. I am going thro some stuff and I need to concentrate on that for a while. I will be here periodically but if you need me or just wanna talk and I'm not here just call me and if you dont have my number and I am really good friends with you then send me a private message and I will give you the number where you can reach me. Love you all bunches mwah!!

I want to say sorry to everyone right now I am going thru a few things that aren't so great so if Im not around that much or come accross angery or pissy its not at you. I have had a few ppl ask whats wrong and why I am being so upset. I dont want to go into it I'm just having a hard time right now. I love you all. *kisses* Liz

APPARENTLY I GOT ENTERED INTO THE SEDUCTIVE EYES CONTEST. DIDNT EVEN KNOW I WAS GONA BE IN IT LMAO BUT PLEASE HELP ME WIN OR AT LEAST PLACE LMAO. ALL THE RATES AND COMMENTS WILL BE ADDED TOGETHER SO PLEASE BOMB THE HIT OUT OF MY PIC. LOVE YOU GUYS BUNCHES! < DON'T FORGET TO SHOW THE PERSON HOLDING THE CONTEST SOME LOVE TOO!!!WhiteRider®™ ~FAMILY~ SEDUCTIVE EYES CONTEST IS OPEN

@ CherryTAP

I know that everything happens for a reason but why? Are these reasons really that great? You have something great starring you in the face and you pass it up for the possibility of something you have wanted for a while and that turns sour and the person you passed up ends up in a fucked up relationship or so called relationship. You find something with somone else that has the possibility of being good but you still wonder what could have been. Why did you pass it up? Why did you let the power that the other person had (has) over you control you? And what about this new person who you have strong feelings for? Were you supposed to be with the person you passed up or are you supposed to be with the person that you might have something great with now? Did you do the right thing by this or did you totally fuck up your life as well as the life of someone else? You see what it has done to you and to the other person and no good has come of it but you still have this other person who says they love you and you want to believe but you are worried about it. Are you able to move on and forget the pain you have not only caused yourself but the pain you have cause another person and be totally with. Are you able to forget the person that has that powerful hold over you? IF so how do you forget it? How do you get them out of your life and how are you able to move on? HOW IN THE HELL DO I GET MYSELF INTO THESE PROBLEMS????????????

I keep trying to find the answer but I guess I will never know. Why does this kind of stuff happen to me? Why do I always end up in impossible situations? Do I put myself in these problems? Do I open myself up to them? Why is it that I know I will always get hurt no matter what? I keep thinking maybe this time will be different, but it never is. Why is it that i shut everyone out but people always find a way in? I try so hard to not let people see the real me cause then it opens myself up for pain but there are a select few that worm their way in or just come through kicking the walls down no matter how many I put up. Why is it that there is always a few people who know your weaknesses no matter how hard you try to hide it. It takes me months to let people into my heart however there are a few that have gotten through in a matter of days without me even knowing. Then i realize this all too late once they have the tools to hurt me. Why must it be that way? Why can't I keep them, well mainly one person particular, out? Why was he able to do this to me? Why was he able to make me worry about him at the drop of a hat? Why am I so easily taken by him? Is not like he is any different than the others. He is still a man that I care for very much but he is a man, and men tend to hurt me. How do I know this one is different even though I have put my life on hold for him. Should I have don't that or should i say fuck it. And if i say fuck it what if he was the one I was men to be with? But what if I sit here waiting I miss the person I am supposed to be with? Yes there are a few people that I care for deeply but I am not sure I am ready for the kind of relationship they want because of this one guy who was able to break the walls down, the one guy that I melt at the sound of his voice or a hint of smile. No one has ever been able to hold this kind of power over me and it bothers me that I let this happen without even seeing it first. I feel that this is a sign on weakness. I can not be seen as weak then people can hurt me. However I am taking a chance with this so here you have it a glimpse into my head and heart.

I remember when I was your everything. Your world, the person you said I love you to everyday, the person you complained to when you thought you weren't getting enough time. Then that all changed. Why? Why did it have to change? I was prepared to give you my all, everything i had. I was ready to leave it all then you did something unforgivable. You cheated on me. You took what I was willing to offer you and threw it all away. I don't blame the girl in fact me and her have grown close. I blame you. You wanted a second chance and I cant believe I actually thought about giving it to you in a moment of weakness. You knew I was willing to make this work. I would never have done that to you, but you did it to me. I guess I see how important I was to you. I am not sure why I am doing this blog I guess its to get this out there and give myself some closure. However, I have moved on and I will keep moving on without you. I don't want anything bad to happen to you I guess thats just the good side of me. I really wish you hadn't done what you did but you did and we cant help that. It is time to get over it and move on. I am trying to do that and I suggest you do the same. I really did think it would work but I guess you couldn't keep your damn pants zipped. Oh well your lose.