Beth's blog: "just me"

well i was will my hubby friday...damn can anybody tell me if it is love or not?....i mean when he come in we started playing around and having fun with each other....and then he wanted to hold me...it was so sweet....but then we done well u know...and it was sweet too...and right before he left he was talking about how sometimes he misses me....and all this and i looked at him and said well u know u still love me he just said well i didnt say it...b.c he knows if it did then i could tell his girlfriend which will soon to be his baby's mama but really this is the question who does he really love...b.c he dont love her he is with her b.c of the baby....and so but i guess i dont care....i am over him but not....but i am still his wife and i dont care..... sel -n- ndl 4-ever....no matter what...... tell me what yall think love ya....i will be on this coming up week...

sitting here all alone...being sad wishing he would come back home....knowing he loves me but cant...y that is what i ask my self....y dont he just say the hell with it all....y cant we just go back to being us again...but knowing deep down inside that it will never be the same...i wish i could just go back a year....and not try the drug that fuck us up...and not be with that man that never cared in the first place....knowing all he cared about ws trying to get me hooked on that drug and wanted to use me for anything he could...y was i so dumb....i didnt i see it.....but maybe oneday i will be happy again...maybe not with him but with a man that will love me for and not what i can give him...i love him....and he knows it...but he just cant turn his back on that bitch and baby he is going to have....y was i so dumb....y couldnt i give the drug up?....y...that is what i ask myself everyday....y.... sel -n- ndl 4ever i will love him until i die...and i hope he will do the same....