Poetical Inclinationz's blog: "Inclined 2 get Poetical"

....Idle thoughts transpire into visions of you and I standing before he who serves the Most High…it is here I profess and confess which simply can not be denied My love for you defines true, its origin dates back to the first beat of my heart It was present before my first breath, so not even in death will we part I look in your eyes and see my reflection as if it was etched into your soul… I knew then it was possible for two separate entities to intertwine and become whole Energized by your energy, my eyes cloaked by the nostalgia of past life memories you’ve given me, yet and still I see vividly All praise is due to the Creator for giving me the ability to re-cognize you… I grasp your hand tight as we begin on foot, this journey of “us” Watching every step I take closely because I simply cannot bear the thought of burning your trust Looking back only to chuckle at those who came before you Acknowledging the trials and tribulations they took me through conditioned my heart to adore you… You….the flame that lights my fire, my once in a life time lover It was clear from the moment we “met,” we were tailor made for one another My soul shudders with empathy for those who will never know The overwhelming emotions generated from the merging of mated souls…..

I’m suppose to be glowing and swollen anticipating motherhood Lullaby verse rehearsing to soothe cries to come as any mother would I should have your name picked out and your crib assembled Experiencing Braxton Hicks contractions and kicks; full of life, my womb should resemble But my temple of gestation was raided…I’ve been robbed of the world’s greatest joy Now I’m sobbing as I pay homage to what would have been my little girl or boy For two months I enjoyed the essence of your presence within my garden Feelings dropped in my dealings with your pops; because to him, you wasn’t part of the bargain Towards him my heart could harden only so much Part of him was you…and for you, I tried to pardon the disgust I felt like a martyr when we discussed possibilities of abortion But I refused to concede because I believed what I helped to conceive was important Even if it meant “divorcing” the love of my life in order for you to breathe It was a hard decision…But my mother gave me the option of living, and it’s half of her blood I bleed Showing the same love to my seed, I said peace to your pops and did the shoulder frost thing Fool witted, he was cool with it turning his back on the one carrying his first offspring Mentally, it was exhausting to fathom thoughts random on how I was going to make this walk alone Though I was prepared, distraught coupled with scared and I was weakened into pleading for him to come back home It was like chipping at stone with a plastic spoon, I broke myself in the midst of that drastic move Devastation was trigger by his revelation; he never wanted me that’s why he bastard you And with that he threw me beyond stressing into the depths of depression You fought for survival with me as your rival… I didn’t know your growth I was oppressing That lesson was learned when the pain and bleeding began the proceedings of my fields getting tilled before harvest season Stress was like oil as it infiltrated my soils, I let that happened…I should be charged with treason And now I’m grieving as your estimated arrival date nears I’ll never be able to let go of the what could have beens…I’m suppose to be a mother echoes over and over as I shed these tears

You ask me why I’m furious I answer back you can’t be serious… Your expression reads baffled I can’t help but cackle as our bond further unravels Masking the hurt I feel by laughing While you tryin to figure out what happened I’ma give you a refresher course Walk with me please, as we travel back to the source I loved you since my first breath breathed And beyond the day you left me Even when you caused my heart to bleed When you popped up on the scene with another seed And even though my conscience whispered “he’s disgracing you” I held steadfast to an unwavering faith in you I turned my head as if I didn’t see it But when baby number two came, I had no choice but to believe it Children are blessings, and I loved them like they were my own That’s not the part I’m stressing, it’s the infidelity I can’t condone They’re mother and the drama behind her, I refuse to acknowledge I just can’t believe you allowed her to elude you to a promise Of for better or for worse throughout thick and thin The beginning of you and her brought about our end And the part that hurts the most? Was when you provided a false sense of hope Tried to make amends for the hell you created With divorce papers signed, sealed, and dated Not wanting to hate you I offered a take two and forgave you Despite the fact you put me out on the street And put her up in something plush when all she gave you was grief I would ask you for minimal support, you made it seem like I asked for millions But eagerly dish out funds on top of what was mandated by court to her children I felt deprived and neglected Alone in this harsh world, unprotected Loving and honoring you with no reciprocal Miles beyond stupid, and inch short of pitiful I can’t even deal with other men intimately because of you Unable to tell if I’m being loved or used And now I’m suffering, it’s your debt but I’m paying the price My once warm heart has been replaced with ice Caught you laid up with your baby mama, the only reason that’s trife Is because you’re still married to your third wife I went to war with my moms on the strength of you True colors were shown, and now repentance is due Apologies to my earth, of your worth; she tried to warn me If I had only listened…these feelings wouldn’t be able to swarm me Devastation got me incapacitated You not a man, in my eyes you’ve been castrated You got two daughters; and I’m one look at the example you setting How am I supposed to believe in men when you divorce and months later go on to the next wedding? I had my first vision of love the first time I saw my father Now after reading all of this you see why when it comes to relationships I don’t bother…

Dear Beloved, I hope this scribe finds you in good health, but more importantly, healthy spirits…. Since your initial appearance, idle time leads me to thoughts of you… The simple fact that I was sought out by you, leaves me feeling like cherished treasure… Others perished from pressure, but YOU….Stand out with outstanding perseverance… Chuckled at my subtle deterrence, thus, you “got to me…” Like the hands that mold pottery, you reshaped my melodies of “what’s to come” with notes of positivity… Enveloped vividly, visions of YOU travel first class from surface to the core of my being… Fleeting emotions whisper to the Most High, “I want to be the omega to his alpha…” Basking in nostalgia… if you believe in past lives, I’ve touched your heart before… Lured by method of my poetic prowess, Don’t you know I use my soul as a pen…? What comes from the soul goes to the soul… And each word I send equates a kiss blown by the wind… How many have you received…? Your's truly.... Poetical Inclinationz Tahlena “Tea” You already Know…All right RESERVED © January 2006

Love me, I couldn't make you…. 3 years, it took to shake you… all the while my heart secretly wishing for a "take two…" Our paths cross, now I'm half lost and questioning my break through… Hate to love you, love to hate you, determined to redeem myself found, I turn around, hoping escape you… Open my eyes, choking off cries, as I realize I now face you… got to laugh as I pace thro the fucked up shit fate do… Since our demise tried my best to erase you, but we share ties… Questioning your well being under a 'fuck that sucka' disguise… My sanity? I compromised, understanding? I felt deprived… Tormenting myself with the possibility of what we had being a lie… Heavy sighs, to get past this once and for all, I'm ready to try… Deadly this cry, for as much pain he inflicted, I'd take him back in an instant…. Even though his shoulder now frost over, I still love from a distance… I got to let go, but my essence's insistence is met with resistance… Wit persistence and self-forgiveness, I steadily rise… Embracing what we had for what it was, tears accompany 'good bye' Continued… Hate to love you, love to hate you…. redeemed myself found, no longer feel the need to escape you….

My mother didn't birth a liar; so when I say I perspire no dude, the whole truth I solemnly swear It's not a front or façade, a stunt nor mirage; when it comes to men, I simply don't got it in me to care… BUT… I think I'ma have to make an exception for you… Saw your picture, and heard a thousand words, the old adage is true… Mental ascension, I'm tryin to get to the attic of you… From the ground up, stopping at your heart for a second or two… Don't let the short time spent there misconstrue… That's only part of the connection I'm tryin to pursue… Hypnotized by the aura of confidence you exude Something like a star, so I'm into wishing for an interlude Yeah…I'm rough around the edges, BUT that's somethin I think you can soothe So I Flow my intuition, hoping that I'm not being rude… Bumpin Isley Brothers, thinkin of ways with you I wanna groove Mentally, physically, and spiritually, just to name a few I know you heard it all before, as long as there's sunshine; nothing's new I'm different though, words I can prove, because I calculate my moves And go after what I want religiously like those occupying pews I use that simile because similarly I'm seeking truth Emotions are like still waters, so I'ma step to you and test ya mood… And ask you what I wonder…If you hunger for somethin real to consume… Because metaphorically? I want to be the food…