well, today.... has been the worst day i've had in a long time... Ok, i mean, i know i gained a lot of weight from the kids, and i am by far not as small as i used to be, cuz i was TINY.... but, in the past 10 minutes i have been referred to as a "bbw" "large", and, basically told to work out and exercise more, cuz frankly, i'm fat.... and i'm seriously having some issues with this... so, robin is now going on a very very strict diet, and i'm gonna work out all the time, cuz i'm a fucking cow apparently... MOO MOO buckaroo...
lol trying to make myself laugh...
although, i am really sad about this now... i guess i am so self absorbed, i didn't realize HOW fat i am... i am so stuck on myself and how pretty i look, i failed to notice i have turned into a fucking cow.... so... apaprently, it's time for a massive robin overhaul....
ok, lemme add this uh hem "in time diet and exercise will correct me being fat...."
and i think what bothers me the most is i have more muscle on my body than most men, because i HAVE TO, for god's ske i worked in a prison, cleet/cop training REQUIRES you to be able to do shit (physically) that most men can't do... i mean, i'm 5 ft 3... and a chick... i'm gonna HAVE to be able to out do men... i CAN'T be a size 3 anymore.... and i know i need a tummy tuck cuz of where i was pregnant, that baby fat pudge is still there... even sit ups wont correct that shit.... jesus, christ, i have never felt so bad about myself... i was actually COMPLIMENTED while being called fat... i am seriously having a major breakdown today... do women actually ENJOY being called large?!~?!? cuz i need to get a hold of them for some therapy now....
but the good news, scott said he is definately NOT attracted to large girls, and he's seen more of me than anyone and he doesn't think i'm fat :D gotta luv him **kisses sweetie** thanks!!!