dear jesse.
well son it has been a year that you left and went beyond my touch. i will forever miss you and all the times that mean so much to me. i will never forget you not even for a moment! you were my first born and the "small man" in my life. there are many things that i can talk about all the pain you had as a child in not having your dad to see what you had done but i tried to be both to you and to do the best that i could. i know that there were times that you needed me and i was not there and the day you took your life was one of them. no one can tell me because between you and i --we know. i love you more than my own life and i wish that God would grant us one wish ... but that will never be so. for you are up there in the sky and in the ocean blue and every day goes by i am still missing you.
i would like to take this time to thank you -yes you ! if you are reading this far then you are special and a true friend only true friends will feel your pain and tell you they understand. there are those that will not say a word nor leave a remark probably out of a pain they have of their own. i hope and pray that there will be no one i ever know that they would have to feel this kind of pain.
my heart aches every day and i miss him just as much today as i did the day he went away. so thanks for taking the time to see more than the fleshly part of me for there is a real woman that feels thinks and dreams of things in life with these words i say thank you from my heart and may you be blessed for giving respect to me in sharing my loss and seeing my pain, for i love jesse and will think of the good and not the bad the happy and not the sad.
for you my son as you know my heart.... i love you son .....
from your mom