Simply Clueless 808's blog: "FOR MY BELOVED JESSE JAMES"

dear jesse. well son it has been a year that you left and went beyond my touch. i will forever miss you and all the times that mean so much to me. i will never forget you not even for a moment! you were my first born and the "small man" in my life. there are many things that i can talk about all the pain you had as a child in not having your dad to see what you had done but i tried to be both to you and to do the best that i could. i know that there were times that you needed me and i was not there and the day you took your life was one of them. no one can tell me because between you and i --we know. i love you more than my own life and i wish that God would grant us one wish ... but that will never be so. for you are up there in the sky and in the ocean blue and every day goes by i am still missing you. i would like to take this time to thank you -yes you ! if you are reading this far then you are special and a true friend only true friends will feel your pain and tell you they understand. there are those that will not say a word nor leave a remark probably out of a pain they have of their own. i hope and pray that there will be no one i ever know that they would have to feel this kind of pain. my heart aches every day and i miss him just as much today as i did the day he went away. so thanks for taking the time to see more than the fleshly part of me for there is a real woman that feels thinks and dreams of things in life with these words i say thank you from my heart and may you be blessed for giving respect to me in sharing my loss and seeing my pain, for i love jesse and will think of the good and not the bad the happy and not the sad. for you my son as you know my heart.... i love you son ..... from your mom

there are so many people in my friends that come and look and do not comment and rate if you are one of the ones that come and spend time looking and not commenting then delete your self i will be closing my pix that contain nudity because i have worked hard to get to the level i am at by spending time rating and commenting on a lot of people and if you are not returnung the favor then you need to let me know and i will fix the problem either i missed you in adding you or you are new and i have not gotten to you. i appreciate the fact that you come to my page but i want to also accellerate to the top of lost cherry and that is part of the fun that i have here but i spend time taking and putting these pix in and most of you just look and dont comment when you are blocked and can no longer see the pix what then? if by some chance i missed you leave me a message stating that i missed your page and i will come and rate and comment there are a lot of you that i am still working on getting to and i will be there if you want me to soon tell me and if i am on line i will go right to your page and rate and comment your page and pix i am not mad i just wish that you guys understood that we women put them up and hope that since you look you could at least say hi

E HAWAI'I E KU'U ONE HANAU E O HAWAI'I, O SANDS OF MY BIRTH KU'U HOME KULAIWI NEI MY NATIVE HOME 'OLI NO AU I NA PONO LANI E I REJOICE IN THE BLESSINGS OF HEAVEN E HAWAI'I, ALOHA E O HAWAI'I , ALOHA E HAU'OLI NA 'OPIO O HAWAI'I NEI HAPPY YOUTH OF HAWAI'I 'OLI E! 'OLI E! REJOICE! REJOICE! MAI NA AHEAHE MAKANI E PA MAI NEI GENTLE BREEZES BLOW MAU KE ALOHA , NO HAWAI'I LOVE ALWAYS FOR HAWAI'I

jesse james oliva was a great kid sure he made trouble just like any other kid . when he was 15 he got involved with the wrong couple boys and ended up in the detention home for boys for 4 years. when he was released he decided to dedicate his life to making himself a better person and he did a shitty job in the beginning. he experimented with drugs and alcohol,just like most of the rest of the population. however he took it serious and realized he could not handle it.he quit doing drugs and met a girl and they dated for a few months.... he came to me and told me that he was in love with a girl and he was afraid that if he told her the truth about his past he would lose her. i told him that the truth was the best way ,if he lied to her and she was to find out ....it would end. he told her the truth....he was with 2 other boys and a man was beaten to death and he was there.... he was the watch dog for the boys doing the robbery. age 15 and accessory to murder..... he spent 4 years deained and obtained his high school diploma and was released on his 19 th birthday. she knew the truth and loved him for it...they had their first son 2 years later. kainalu he was a good daddy and i was there for my grandsons birth as well... jesse never left that babys side till he went home with them..he loved his son ... then a year and a half later she was born....hokulani makamae... she was tiny and she had trouble from the start of her life ....2 holes in her heart. she had to be fed thru a tube for the first 6 months of her life jackie his wife and jesse took such care of her that she made it to be old enough to have open heart surgery. at this time he had become selfemployed and was running his own business (a branch off the father company)on maui... hoku went into surgery with her daddy there at her side every min every day they had to force him to eat and bathe let alone holding the need to use the toilet till he could no longer do so. she recovered quickly and was thriving without the tube within a week. then came anuhea.....the business booming and he just finished building his own 5 bed room home, he was so proud and told me" mom the french doors ...i hung them and they came out perfect...." and was not one, not a flaw in his work.... he loved being a daddy and father and husband... jesse and jackie had celebrated 6 years together and the children kainalu 4, hoku 2 1/2 and anuhea only 1 month old....then one day he went in to his bedroom and hung himself..... no note..... no answers.....no sense in it he was gone.....why no one can answer that but him.....and God. so my dear friends ther is no gurantee that you have any days and that life is fair...it isn't at times... i find no comfort and i do not smile very often. so when you see me somber he is in my thoughts and mind and he will be my small man forever.. this is the tale of a young life gone without a reason.........................