You live and learn.....at what cost?
Current mood: contemplative
Learning...
I'm learning some thing about myself, some I'm not too proud of this point. I think they were things that I had always known, but they have just all the sudden decided to creep up on me.
As most of you know I am a very open, honest person. Sometimes brutally honest. But I have a big heart, which makes me vunerable to the people which can stomp the shit out of it. Takes me a little longer to comprehend the fact that's what they are trying to do until its too late and I'm already hurt.
EX: A very good friend of mine (or so I thought) has completely written me out of their life. Now i know that some of you (Jen, Jemm) told me this was coming. I just didn't want to believe or see it. I left for 6 weeks, and not one single email to say, "hey how ya doin?" This is the same person that I have had trials and tribulations with over and over, and still succummed myself to their punishment. So in an attempt to show them how they were hurting me, (because phone calls weren't being returned and im's were being ignored) I emailed them letting them know how I felt, and it was completely turned around on me. I was treated like a selfish, childish brat. Now don't get me wrong I want everyone to be happy with their lives, but if you've been my friend for quite some time, and then you decide to drop off, I can't easily ignore that.
Anyway the point is, good friends, are really hard to come by, I'd take a damn good friend over the love of my life (WTF is that anyway?) anyday.
So, if you're just planning on dropping off after you find out that things aren't always as EXCITING as they should be, then do so now, because I'm not going to prepare myself for utter humiliation and disbelief because you can't have more than one friend at a time.
;)