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I went through life living in the past for many years. Now that I have a new future ahead of me, I am still thinking a little in the past. I do not want to be alone, I have a wonderful man in my life and we have plans for the future, but that old memory of possibly losing a spouse keeps coming to the forefront of my mind. I have been married 3 times and I am a widow twice, can't stand the thought of being a widow 3 times, that is what keeps the past close to me. I know I need to let go, but I remember the pain I have gone through. The tears I have shed, how many times I have cried myself to sleep in a cold and lonely bed and it scares the Hell out of me. |
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