Howdy Ya'll! I'm Samantha, The Owner of this profile. Welcome to apart of my world. OK ya'll here is the stuff that men have done to me.
. Basie Coercion
. Reproduction Coercion
. Pressure-Release
. Threatening to leave a relationship
. Turn Around
. Blame
. Humiliation
. Isolation
. Intimidation
. Excuse Making
. Redefining
. Success Fantasies
. Lying
. Assuming
. Above the rules
. Making fool of me
. Fragmentation
. Minimizing
. Vagueness
. Anger
. Power Play
. Playing Victim
. Drama & Excitement
. Closed Channel
. Ownership
. Self-glorification
The tricks they played to get back with me to hurt me more.
. The honeymoon Syndrome
. Super parent syndrome
. Revival syndrome
. Sobriety syndrome
. Counseling syndrome
Family life
. I'm a adult child of family Dysfunction
Here is what this stuff has done to me over 32 1/2 years of all of the above that you read.
. Guessing what normal is
. Having difficulty in following a project through to completion
. lie, whan it would be just as easy to tell the truth
. Judge myself without mercy
. Having difficulty having fun
. Take myself very seriously
. having difficulty with relationships
. Over-reacting to changes over which I have no control
. Constantly seeking approval and affirmation
. Extremely loyol even when there is evidence the loyalty is undeserved
. Lack myself into a course of action without giving serious consideration to alternate behaviors or possible consequences
. Seek tension and crisis and then complain about the results
. Avoid conflict or aggravate it; rarely do they deal with it
. Fear rejection and abandonment, yet are rejecting of others
. Fear failure but sabotage their success
. Codependency
. Having difficulty identifying what I'm feeling
. Having difficulty expressing feelings
. Worry about how others may respond to my feelings, opinions, and behavior
. I'm afraid of being hurt and/or rejected by others
. Minimize, alter or deny how I truly feel and feel the same
. I'm afraid to express differing opinions or feelings
. Put other people's needs and desires before my own
. Judge everything I think, say, or do harshly, as never "good enough"
. I'm a perfectionist
. Do not ask others to meet my needs or desires
. Do not perceive myself as lovable and worthwhile
Love & Relationship
. Lack of nurturing and attention when young
. Feeling isolated, detached from parents and family
. Outer facade of "having it all together" to hide internal disintegration
. Mistake intensity for intimacy
. Hidden pain
. Seek to avoid rejection and abandonment at all cost
. Afraid to trust anyone in a relationship
. Inner rage over lack of nurturing, early abandonment
. Depressed
. Sense of worthlessness
Now I see why no man in his right mind would want me with all these problems. So I guess I will stay singel and lonely. This is why I'm no good for anyone. I've built a wall around my heart so I will not get hurt anymore it was not to keep anyone out. But to see who loves me enough to clom over it and take me as I'm

I have the right to be treated with dignity, compassion, and respect at all times.
I have the right to make my own decisions about the course of my life.
I have the right to dream-and to work toward making these dreams come true.
I have the right to feel good about as a person and as a woman.
I have the right to choose who will be my friends, whom I will spend time with, and whom I will confide in.
I have the right to make mistakes.
I have the right to be happy.
I have the right to ask for what I want.
I have the right to follow my own values and standards.
I have the right to express all of my feelings, both positive and negative.
I have the right to say no.
I have the right

I Got Flowers Today

I got flowers today!
It wasn't my Birthday or any other special day.
We had our first argument last night;
And he said a lot of cruel things that really hurt;
I know that he is sorry and didn't mean to say the things he said;
Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today!
It wasn't our anniversary or any other special day.
Last night, he threw me into a wall and started to choke me.
It seemed like a nightmare.
I couldn't believe that it was real.
I work up this morning sore and bruised all over.
I know he must be sorry.
Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today!
It wasn't our anniversary or any other special day;
Last night he threw me into a wall and then started chking me;
It seemed unreal, a nightmare, but you wake up from nightmares;
And I woke up this morning sore and druised all over-but I know he is sorry;
because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today!
And it wasn't Valentines Day or any other special day;
Last night he beat me and threatened to kill me;
Make-up and long sleeves didn't hide the cuts and bruises this time;
I couldn't go to work today because I didn't want anyone to know-but I know he's
sorry;
Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today!
And it wasn't mother's day or any other special day;
Last night he beat me again, and it was worse then all of the other times;
If I leave him, what will I do? How will I take care of the kids? what about money?
I'm afraid of him, but I'm too scared and dependent to leave him! But he must be
sorry;
Because he sent me flowers today.

I got flowers today....
Today was a special day - it was the day of my funeral;
Last night he killed me;
If only I would have gathered the couage and strength to leave him;
I could have received help from the Women's Shelter, but I didn't ask for their
help;
So I got flowers today - for the last time.

this is what Might happen to me one day just beatings on the inside once you don't see. Feelings shut off and the feeling of don't give a shit sets in.