Not really good at describing myself I leave that to others to do, all I know is that I am happy with who I am on the inside. On the outside I have hit my 100,000 mile warranty and I am looking for total tune up.

I have a girlfriend who I am sooooooooooooooooo very much IN LOVE with, we took a road less traveled but in the end it was the right one for us. I am planning to take this realtionship to the next level sooner than later. I LOVE YOU sweetie. (and yes my patients did pay off).

Yes I know I have a really, really, really common name (it sucks) but I can spell it backwards (which is really helpful after a night/day or 2 of heavy drinking) (trust me I know a little something about this) can you -- can you what --- I don't know ask the psycho next to me. No way I am just letting this one go.

NO I am not the BOB from thr ENZYTE commercials . (But it might not be a bad idea?????)

OK lets be honest if you had an erection last for more than 4 hours because of Viagara, would you really go to the hospital right away or would you use that sucker up until it was bloody and ready to fall off.

Hey to all you earthlings I am just visiting until the mothership comes back for me. They said it was just a research mission they promised to come back REALLY.Some random thoughts while I wait for my ride.

You haters and drama queens are the reason why some species eat thier young at birth.

By the way be careful when you let your mind wander who knows where its going or where its been and lord knows when it will comeback. Mine slipped its leash years ago and has yet to come back. It has more fun without me.

If you see it out wandering (my mind) please escort it home. It is way to little to be out all by itself.

I have a photographic memory, it just never gets developed.

May the schwartz be with you.
that was good helmet.
I am a mawog, part man part dog I am my own best friend.

I stopped fighting the insanity and just embraced it. (and I am never letting go hahahahaha....etc). Lets all take a ride on the lunatic fringe.

You have now entered my DOMAIN, check your sanity at the door and prepare for the journey of your life.

Remember that no one is perfect and that even the best of us slip up sometimes.

If I am no one and no one is perfect, does that make me perfect (it is a thought hehehehe).

I live in my own little world but at least everyone knows me and most even like me.

Hello me, It's me again hoping you where home will stop back later.

Of all the things I have lost over the years I miss my mind the most.

Yes I DO talk to myself when I need some intellagent conversation. It helps keep my insanity in proper perspective.

I am out of my mind right now leave me a message an I will get back to as soon as I return.......BEEP

Just because I have questionable morales doen't mean I have no standards.And There isn't enough beer in the world to lower my standards for you.

To this day I will never understand how we have survived as a species much less evolved to become the "intelligent" species...........LMAO

hey what are you laughing at you under-developed primate the real joke is the space between your ears and in your pants .......sorry that was my evil twin being controled by the evil voices, they are actually cute warm and fuzzy once you get to know them.

I can't believe this f*cked up world which where living in, still I try to do the best that I can....TESLA

I went to the cemetary looking for love, my baby was buried, I had to dig her up...... the headstones

I finally know why marriage sucks the romance out of a realtionship, you are sleeping with a realtive.

I hate political jokes, way too many of them get elected.

Not to piss of you smokers.... But isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in the swimming pool.

Some lawyer jokes......
1) whats the difference between lawyers and grapes, you take your boots off to stomp grapes.
2) what are the difference between lawyers and vultures, lawyers get frequent flier miles.
3) why did the lawyer break his nose, the ambulence stopped at the red light.

Star wars thoughts.....
1) vader was framed....just ask him
2) come to the dark side....I have flashlights
3) Chewie is really Luke's father

Christmas gift list.......
1) a misletoe belt buckle for me
2) for my ex-wifes leather under wear with the sharp studs on the inside, and a gag ball to shut them the hell up for once
3) Facial hair for thier new husband/boyfriends so I know which end I am talking too.
4) To wake up and find my boss on the back of a milk carton.

I am not right and I just dont give a crap!!!!! AMEN

also check out my stash for more jokes and insight to the world I call my mind.........