I am a 37 year old version of me when I was 16. Hopefully a little bit smarter, a little bit wiser and maybe a slight bit less funny. I had my first beer around then. So, all the years in between 16 and now did not really matter until five years ago when I became sober. They say that I died for a brief second as my liver began to fail. I spent almost 2 weeks in a coma where I learned how to fight and welcome the good in me and the evil in me. I had no choice but to confront myself and make the choice of life and death. I later came to find out on my own that the living part, the choice I had to make was not so much a gift from god but also a curse and a lesson. The curse is the disease that I have called cirrhosis. And the lesson was that anything can be accomplished even if you fall a few times along the way. I learned when I woke from that coma, that the people that surrounded my bedside where not there for a field trip. They were there because they care. Lo and behold, when you think you are the only selfish person that ever thought about yourself… you have this family and out of the woodwork with no help from you , come your long time friends. I learned that I should never sell my friends short. The best friend could be the friend that you had not seen I a long long time. The costs of sobriety are very high. It cost me my own sister and all the ones that I loved and cared about the most were vanishing. My sister told me that she did’nt believe in god . I did not believe her. Now I myself wonder if because I believe in god that I was given this second chance and my sister was not. I guess you could say that I live or try to live my new life the way that she would have had she gotten that second chance. I am a firm believer in good versus evil. I think that this world is driven by the devil and owned by God. And I believe that in every crisis or downfall… something good will always no matter what, overcome. My sister left me a lot of special memories and two wonderful smart and gorgeous nieces. Slowly the pieces are fitting back together. Baby steps…patience…will power… and knowledge. I have a wonderful lady name Jaina that loves me ( mostly because of my huge salami ) lol she puts up with my temper and rides shotgun through my hard times with her arms around me. And she keeps me on my toes with her 2 super kiddos ! I bitch a lot, I yell a lot, I get pissed really easy. I deal with it with out booze. Wow…I Guess life aint so bad. ** BOSABURN** just a nick name of a buddy of mine from way back there is a blog about it..