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| | You'd have to be a moron not to get this!!!!!!!! |
| created @ 03/8/2007 08:08 pm |
| mum expired. [EVERYONE] |
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My brother taught me this one:
A guy walks into a bar, see's a fat ass jar of money sitting on the bar. There has to be at least $4000 in the jar. There's a sign next to it that says, "Do what bartender says, win money." So the guy walks up to the bar and sits down.
He asks the bartender, "Noticed the sign. What do I gotta do?" The bartender looks at the guy and says, "Well, first you have to buy something." So the guy buys a 1/5th of Jack. The bartender sets it down in front of him with a glass. "Ok, here's what you have to do," says the bartender. "You see that 300 pound biker sitting there by the window?" They guy nods. "You have to knock him off of his stool." The guy looks at the bartender and says, "Ok, is that it?" Bartender says no.
"There's a bulldog out back, meanest fuckin' dog I've ever seen. Won't let anyone near him. And people are too afraid to go up to him. He has a tooth abscese, you have to pull it out." Guy looks at the bartender and says, "Is that it?" Bartender shakes his head.
"You see that woman sitting by the pool table? You have to give her an orgasm." And the bartender goes back to what he was doing.
The guy sitts there for a minute, having his fourth glass of Jack. He finally downs the rest of the bottle, stands up and walks over to the biker.
BOOM!! He knocks him off his chair. The biker was dead drunk anyways. So the guy is pummped up, adreneline goin'. He walks over to the back door, kicks it open and lets it slam behind him.
The bartender notices a lot of screaming coming from the guy. So about 5-6 minutes pass. The guy kicks the door back open, he's all bloody and bruised. He looks at the bartender and asks him,
"Where's the woman with the tooth abscese?" |
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