VideoChat Rules for Men
Or, How to actually get women to talk with you
After quite a few years of talking with and listening to men whine about the lack of women that respond to them, I have decided to try and set out a few basic rules to help guys become more successful at getting women to chat. These rules are not a guarantee to success, but if you read and pay attention, pretty soon you may find that you actually have to start limiting the number of women you chat with.
Rule #1 - Understand what women want
Most guys come to VideoChat programs thinking that women are looking for immediate sex. The common misconception is that the ladies using chat programs are all sitting around naked just waiting for that next guy so they can have a little "fun".
Guys .. GET A CLUE! This is the furthest thing from the truth there could possibly be. Ladies are not turned on by seeing your unclad body. Maybe someday after they get to know you they MIGHT actually want to see you naked. But NOT right away. And certainly NOT before they know you. Women need to get to know you first. They need to trust you first.
There was a recent study done in which attractive men approached strange women. They asked one of three questions: "Would you like to go out on a date sometime", "Would you like to come back to my place for a drink", and "Would you like to have sex with me". About 50% of the women said yes to the "date" question, 5% said yes to the "my place" question .. and NONE said yes to the "sex" question. Does that tell you something?
What DO women want?
Most women use VideoChat programs because they are bored, they are lonely, or they enjoy conversing with someone other than their children. They want to hold real conversations that cover a wide range of topics. They need mental stimulation to keep them from strangling the nearest moving object (which has probably been screaming "MOMMY!" all day long).
They are interested in current events, hobbies, computers, relationships ... all manner of things. They MIGHT even be just a wee bit horny. But that's none of your business. At least not yet.
What do women NOT want?
That's a much simpler list. Here are some examples that might give you a clue.
Women do NOT want:
To be yelled at, cursed at, or berated for anything. They get enough of that already. They are here to escape from that.
To be told what to do. They are adults with their own minds and fully capable of deciding their own actions.
To be called baby, cutie, honey, sweetie, or any other cutesy name like that. Those are terms of endearment to be used ONLY by those they are close to. They don't know you and therefore you're not allowed to use those names.
To be called stupid, idiot, dummy, lame-brain or any of those other slurs. They are already married to a guy that does that way too often. They are using VideoChat to get away from him.
Give them what they want, not what they don't want
That's really pretty obvious, but since the obvious thing is often the one thing we men don't do ... I'll say it again. Do NOT "assume" women are here for sex. DO try to find out what they are interested in. If their interests are not the same as yours ... find someone else to chat with.
Next - Rule #2 - How to say "Hello"
