HowYrMumsCawkFeelz's blog: "Untitled"

i dont know what it is but i cant let go,
something inside me feels you so.
no matter what i do or what i say,
every breath i take gives you away.
friends and family wonder why i smile,
almost 19 weeks, its been awhile.
since i was lost til i found you,
who you are, and what you do.
There's things i dont know things i cant see,
but i know this much, you've got me.
wrapped around your finger around your soul,
you've filled this void, this dark never ending hole.
I kept falling deep into black,
my thoughts a never ending attack.
I'm sorry if i scare you, you let me in,
I felt a spark, i had let it begin,
i didnt believe in love til i met you,
and know im not sure what to do.
I suddenly believe if there's love theres hope,
And that if i dont have you i dont know how id cope.
I love you bear, the tears i cry,
are tears of joy, you've brought me to life.

Anything for you
Though you’re not here
Since you said we’re through
It seems like years
Time keeps draggin on and on
And forever’s been and gone
Still I can’t figure what went wrong

I’d still do anything for you
I’ll play your game
You hurt me through and through
But you can have your way

Anything for you
Though you’re not here
Since you said we’re through
It seems like years
Time keeps draggin on and on
And forever’s been and gone
Still I can’t figure what went wrong

I’d still do anything for you
I’ll play your game
You hurt me through and through
But you can have your way

I can pretend each time I see you
That I don’t care and I don’t need you
And though you’ll never see me cryin’
You know inside I feel like dying
And I’d do anything for you
In spite of it all
I’ve learned so much from you
You made me strong
But don’t you ever think that I don’t love you
That for one minute I forgot you
But sometimes things don’t work out right
And you just have to say goodbye

I hope you find somone to please you
Somone who’ll care and never leave you
But if that someone ever hurts you
You just might need a friend to turn to

And I’d do anything for you
I’ll give you up
If that’s what I should do
To make you happy

I LOVE YOU sO fUCKING MUCH

Sometimes the edge serves
As more than a friend
Than you thought it would be
And the pages you write
In your mind every night
Are your only release
And the mask you put on
It’s like words in a song
But there’s more to be seen
And the failures you see
Don’t seem failures to me here at all

I’m begging you no
There’s more life left to go
I’m begging you please
Cause I don’t want you to leave.Alone as you walk
Through a crowd and its awkward
Like nobody sees
And you can't help but wonder
Would anyone come after you
If you’d leave.

So a pain grows inside
And a fear comes alive
Like you’ll never be free
But there’s no pain you feel
That I know love can't heal here at all

’m begging you no
There’s more life left to go
Oh
I’m begging you please
Cause I don’t want you to leave me.

These walls are closing in on me,

in the distance, there's something i cannot see.

The sky is black, the ground is cold,

the hurt is beginning to take its toll.

On my mind, im falling deep,

into a presipis, I begin to weep.

The tears they fall down my cheek,

over my frown, im feeling weak.

As the tears travel down over my chest,

and over my heart, its frozen at best.

I close my eyes and curl up in bed,

Pulling the covers over my head.

Anger fills up my soul,

I bet its something you've never known.

the sweet girl you once knew,

lied to me, look what you put me through.

Im at my breaking points sick of the shit,

I dont know what to do with it,

the feelings i have for people that lie,

ill take this to the grave, til the day i die.

If you dare keep my friend ship be warned,

from the heart u ripped out and torn.

You're a fucking coward you cant face the pain,

the feelings, the hate, the wrong, it pours down like rain,

on your soul as it thickens into the ground,

no longer will you smile when im around.

Becareful what you wish for becareful what you say,

because no longer will i FEEL the same way.

Placed in side this deep dark hole,

a heart beats weak, along with a soul.

It cries out for someone, "Any one there?"

Her body ignores it without any care.

She paces the floor from left to right,

Glancing passed anyone in sight.

Dead to her, she ignores her soul,

without any trust she let it go.

Standing in the darkness she no longer fears,

Lies, heartache, and life, the end feels near.

The walls are up they are meant to last,

This time for good, so long to the past.

Because placed inside this deep dark hole,

a heart beats weak with an unrested soul.

Looking around the room I see,

Nothing seem so amuse me.

For a place so full it feels so bare,

I'm lonely now and I don't think I care.

I've come to realize I can't care at all,

Looking out now into the hall.

I see darkness as I feel my heart,

Beating rapidly as it falls apart.

Slowly it breaks, day by day,

No longer I care if it fades away.

The love I once had for so many others,

It was only a fantasy, this I've discovered.

What do I do now but lie still in bed?

Close my eyes, resting my head.

With too many things running through my mind.

Searching for answers I'll never find.

There's no reason to sit up and weep,

Just pull the covers over my soul and sleep.

If I die will you take my hand,
And walk with me through this endless land.
This land of darkness, greed and fury,
So I no longer have to worry.
So I can die in peace knowing why,
Every night a child cries.
For something or someone to love and to hold,
because all they've ever felt was bitter and cold.
A life like mine is all they share,
But they never find out until they dare.
To pick up a knife or a gun,
Shedding a tear as it glistens in the sun.
Realizing it wasnt worth the plow,
But its too late, it's all over now.