True Friendship
Are you tired of those sissy-ass "friendship" poems that
always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? Well,
here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship:
1. When you are sad -- I will help you get drunk and
plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever
is choking you.
3. When you smile -- I will know you finally got laid.
4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it
every chance I get.
5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible
stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.
6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.
7. When you are sick -- Stay the hell away from me until
you are well again. I don't want whatever you have.
8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your
clumsy ass.
9. This is my oath..... I pledge it to the end. "Why?"
you may ask; "because you are my friend".
Remember.......A good friend will help you move.....a
REALLY good friend will help you move a body.......let me know if
you ever need me to bring a shovel.
Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you
can feel the true warmth.
