> > I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for
> > the following reasons:
> >
> > 1-------- I do physical labor.
> > 2.------- I work at great depths.
> > 3.------- I plunge head first into everything I do.
> > 4.------- I do not get weekends or public holidays off.
> > 5.--------I work in a damp environment.
> > 6. -------I work in a dark area that has poor ventilation.
> > 7.------- I work in high temperatures.
> > 8. -------My work exposes me to diseases.
> >
> >
> > Reply: Dear Penis,
> >
> > After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have >raised,
> > the management denies your request for the following reasons:
> >
> > 1. You do not work 8 hours straight.
> > 2. You WORK IN SHORT SPURTS AND fall asleep after EACH
> > brief work period
> > 3. You do not always follow the orders of the management team.
> > 4. You do not stay in your designated area, and are often seen >visiting
> > other locations.
> > 5. You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and >stimulated in
> > order to start working.
> > 6. You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift.
> > 7. You don't always observe necessary safety regulations, such as >wearing
> > the correct protective clothing.
> > 8. You will retire LONG before you are 65.
> > 9. You are unable to work double shifts.
> > 10. You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have >completed
> > the assigned task.
> > 11. And if that were not all, you have constantly been se en entering >and
> > exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious
> > look ing bags.
> >
> > Sincerely, The Management
> >
> > Five reasons not to be a penis
> >
> > 1. You're bald your whole life.
> > 2. You have a hole in your head.
> > 3. Your neighbors are nuts.
> > 4. The guy behind you is an ass hole and...
> > 5. Every time you get excited, you throw up and then faint.