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Savage's blog: "The end"

created on 07/15/2010  |  http://fubar.com/the-end/b334400  |  1 followers

I Never Thought

You were the last I would have ever expected to lie to me and leave me alone. To wonder where you've gone and what you're doing and what I did to deserve this. I don't remember my life without you in it. And I don't remember what its like to not have someone to call and cry to no matter the time. And I don't remember what its like to not have you do the same. I never thought you would forget me. And I never thought that you could be the monster that you've proven to be. And the sad part is. I still miss you. and I have a feeling that I always will.

hurt and relationships

Sometimes I just don't realize how much it hurts to be alive.

Its a constant part of every day life. The prick of a finger, a fresh tattoo,  the slip of a blade or regular wear and tear on the body.

Then there are more uncommon types.

Why is it that even though love is a chemical reaction in the brain, we feel our hearts sink when its been broken. Our emotions are so strong, we can physically feel it. But we recover and try again.

And hope is the only thing that keeps us in this pattern. The hope that someday we may love again, someday we will be able to think of these things without feeling that your heart is about to explode.  Or the hope that maybe the person you love will change.

There are those of us that hold onto that last hope. That our love will realize their errors or their hurtful flaws, and will decide to evaluate themselves, and their life.

They never change.

To the ones that have been beaten, cheated on, lied to, emotionally mistreated. For those that are made to feel that others mistakes are their fault. To those that cry themselves to sleep at night wondering why they don't feel loved when they give everything they have.

You are worth more.

and they aren't.

To the end of an emotional roller coaster. And to the bottom of the next.

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