Heather,
I feel like I need to write this and don't even understand why myself. In ones life you meet many people you call friends. But you only have one best friend and one soul mate not usually one of the same. You have a way about you that pulls one in, making everyone that knows you want to be that one and only in your life, to be able to share what you have and experience what you do just to be a part of your life. I can tell your holding back on your own happiness to make others around you happy, but it's time for you now to be the one in your life that is happy and I think I know just the person that can take you there. If your looking for a soul mate I'm looking for a best friend and I think we both know what the other is truly looking for. The wall you have put up is not to keep every one out but to see who loves you enough to climb it, see you on the other side. Jeff
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