so here we go.... winter is here and everyones broke.... but look on the bright side....gas prices came down a lil.
but its still gonna be a rough TG this nov. without mom. im almost sure dad is gonna break down at the table. but we'll make it thru...like we do with everything.
but check this out.
after mom passed on sept 10th....dad was looking in his office closet for something...and came across a bag.....he opened it...and realized it was a christmas gift he and mom bought a few months back 4 my sister linda. so Linda will be getting a christmas gift from mom this year ...3 1/2 months after she passed..... so Christmas is gonna be rough as well.....
it wasn't till like last nite till i realized that this will be the first holiday...besides halloween...without mom and all her cooking and traditions....
i can still see her smile when i walk around the house....when im in the living room watching tv...i see her sitting in the chair like she always had whenever i was at home. or when i wake up in the morning....i can still see her making breakfast for pops and making sure his insulin and stuff r ready 4 him. or when i get home in the afternoon and no one is home....i feel like mom and dad r out at lunch....but only dad comes back....and when its 530...and im out.... i keep thinking i wqish i was home for dinner...cuz th@s when mom always had it ready..... but all the pots and pans and dishes remain untouched.... and the smells of moms burning candles now cease to be....and all thats left are moms little trinkits and stuff scattered around the house.... scattered memories of someone who once lived there.....but all there is now...is silence. and when its quiet...and no one is around but me.... i know shes sitting with me there....and when im at the dinner table....i know shes in the kitchen smiling at me...and when im out....shes over my shoulder making sure her little boy is gonna be ok,...
and those last words she said to me.....the words that will be with me for ever.... when i told her that i loved her... she answered......i love you too. i miss you mom....and i'll never forget.
