Last night Raymond was taken home with the lord.it is so hard trying to understand why him. a man who was finally happy have his life taken. and i , i had to love him enough to let him go and not suffer. i thought loosing my grandmother and a friend was hard. this loosing the man i love and was gonna spend the rest of my life with is gone. i cant eat and cant sleep. i think i hear his voice and look at the door wating for him to come in and i have to realize that its not happening. and telling my two youngest kids the man they have knw for the last 3 months that gave them all the time in the day and was a true father figure and cared and loved them wont be coming home. leaving the hospital my youngest 2 year old boy screamed he wanted pat (raymond) he loves that man everything was pat this and pat that. i cant help but break down and cry and when i think i have no more tears to cry i start crying again.
