teacherbob's blog: "Rant Yall"

F U and U and U Current mood: thoughtful Well I guess that got your attention. So this last couple weeks has been a couple weeks of partying and drinking hell. I seriously don't think it has stopped since I became single. It seems every time I am going to have an easy night, something comes up. I have had a blast, but I am going to kill myself if I keep going like this. There were nights I don't remember driving home, and nights that I know I should not have. So I have done some thinking during my drive time today. 1. I need to stop drinking for a while. I need to get my life in order and organize myself. Drinking really won't help anything in the long run except take away from what I am trying to save and do. 2. I need to kick up the work outs big time. The start of the school year I stepped in a nasty pothole while running and messed up everything really bad from my back on down. I started doing ok and getting back to it some, then almost stopped again while dating Ash. Turns out it is really hard to get out of bed with a beautiful woman laying beside you. So I am back to my 5am jogs every day. I also last week went to working out lifting and doing heavy bag work 3 days a week. I want another week of two a day workouts then I am going to go down and join ground control and get back into fighting. I really miss the boxing and karate that I used to be into. My goal is to be sitting right around 200 pounds even by the end of the school year, and in fighting shape. 3. I need to go back to training with firearms. I am going to concentrate this year on shooting old school style. I am going to shoot all single stack division. The iron sights are going to be rocked and the open guns are going away. I know this is not me typically, but I started back years ago with single stacks and just feel this will be a way for me to refocus and train. I will make Master class or higher this year in Single Stack. 4. I need to start working on getting hired by the prison system as a teacher or find a teaching job back in Cumberland within 2 years. Once back I want to start my own training company on the ranges I have. I want to take my knowledge gained from martial arts and single stack division and form an east coast training company on defensive techniques. 5. I need to be ok with me. I know right now that parts of my personality have stopped me from building good relationships with several important people over the years. Over the last 5 years I have had the opportunity to date some amazing people. I think I have messed up the relationships that we started just because of how I feel about myself at times. 6. I need to smile. I need to be real to myself. I need to be happy. 7. I need my friends. I know at times I have left some friends drop away over the years. I just want you to know that I realize I have messed up. I miss some of my good friends and it is time to rebuild some of those friendships. I realized last time I was in Frostburg that I do love a lot of the people from that area. I am not sure I will ever have friends like that here. The last trip I made for the weekend let me see a lot. Over the last couple years I have lost best friends. 8. Seeing Angie and Kyler really made me think about things I have done over the past couple years. I was there for a lot of her life as a friend, she was there for a lot of mine. I was there early and was asked to be his godfather. I realized that he does like when he gets to see me. I need to make a point of seeing them more. I hope this makes sense to some of you. I will still be going out, but won't be drinking etc. I need to be a better person. For those of you I have hurt I truly am sorry. It is time for me to change.

Ok, so as one of my good friends told me today I love attention. Thats right I love to be the center of everyones attention. I am loud, obnoxious and generally do whatever I want so that everyone has to pay attention to me. So we go to DC today to hit up the Smithsonia, and I will post pics later. But anyhow tours two of the oriental exhibits about and spend some time walking about in the garden. Dawn and I then decide we need food. So I make a call to see where food is about that area. So we find out some things going on as for food on the phone and decide to hit the natural history museum. We hike about in there and we walk out. So upon walking out one of those lovely black suburbans with government tags rolls up on us. Yeah you know those ones that you generally don’t want to see rolling up on you. Well anyhow it rolls up and we have a conversation with 3 gentleman wearing vests and carrying machine guns. After the conversation we walk up to Frado’s Irish Pub and grab some grub and brews then headed back to bmore.

Outpost Ok, so picked up the movie the other day. I had never heard of it but it said on the cover "you can’t kill whats already dead" Immediately I was thinking allright a cool ass zombie flic. So I picked it up. Long story, but really cool. Basically a bunch of Nazi Zombie’s killing anyone that comes near their old base. Turns out the Nazi’s created a way to keep people living no matter what happens to them. They had created a small force through these experiments. Well guys show up to capture the machine that produces the energy to control them. Needless to say they well have to fight it out. Pretty good movie, watch it.. Previews..... Zombie Strippers - with Jenna Jameson, can’t wait to see it. Imagine Jenna with an AK. Bats, Human Harvest - Pretty sick. I am skeered of bats anyhow so it really has me. Boogeyman 2 - looks sick, but eh dunno. Was not a fan of the boogeyman, but Tobin Bell(SAW) is in it. Revolver - haha, Ray Liota is in it so I sort of what to see it. Further Jason Statham(Transporter) is in it as well so it should be ok. Looks like it should be pretty action packed and have a good story line. Southland Tales - The Rock is in this one as well as some other stars. The people who made this were behind Donnie Darko if that gives you any idea. Looks great. April Fool’s Day - hmm, not to sure about this one. it starts at a Debutant Ball, whatever. The only thing that might make it good is well the 18 year olds get nekid. Maybe it will be ok, looks like a take off of Grave Dancers in some way.

An Essay on God - Draft with thoughts - First thoughts Ok, so some of you know how I feel about this subject, but recently I have been doing more reading about religion, faith, and non faith. I have often been worried about people being able to blindly follow what rationally is wrong. I mean I know great scientific and mathematical minds that blindly believe in god. Basically I will start with these questions: Why do people believe in god? What forces this belief? Is faith beneficial or detrimental to society(the world) as a whole? I will open with this quote from Nietzsche, " The concept of "God" invented as a counter-concept of life - everything harmful, poisonous, slanderous, the whole hostility unto death against life synthesized in this concept in a gruesome unity! The concept of the "beyond," the "true world" invented in order to devaluate the only world there is - in order to retain no goal, no reason, no task for our earthly reality! The concept of the "soul," the "spirit," finally even "immortal soul," invented in order to despise the body, to make it sick - "holy"; to opposewith a ghastly levity everything that deserves to be taken seriously in life, the questions of nourishment, abode, spiritual diet, treatment of the sick, cleanliness and weather! In place of health, the "salvation of the soul" - that is a folie circulaire between pernitential convulsions and hysteria about redemption! the concept of "sin" invented along with the torture instrument that belongs with it, the concept of "free will," in order to confuse the instincts, to make mistrust of the instincts second nature! What does all this mean? Nietzsche questioned faith, religion, and god in some ways in his writings. He poses concepts based on the fact that people do manic-depresive things to themselves in the name of religion. The concept of "god"(God, Allah, whatever you believe in as your god) as the counter concept to life. Think of what you do in life to enjoy yourself. Do you consdier yourself a good person? By reading in or blindly following the word of some churches I am certain that at least one church somewhere could find fault with what you do in their eyes of god. Do you drink coffee? Well if so that is considered a sin to the Mormon’s. What about alcohol? Again mormons and more. Are you tattooed or pierced? Many religions find fault with these practices yet they go back through pre christian times. To further define god as the counter concept to life we must consider some pains that people place their bodies through in order to reach a higher state of enlightenment. What do I mean by pains to their bodies. How many of you know someone that fasts in the name of god to reach a higher state of enlightenment. In reality all they are doing is placing their body in a slight state of shock causing some minor halucinations in order to reach enlightenment. How many of my medical friends would like to chime in on the health of fasting. We as educated individuals must account for the fact that originally fasting was set up in order to help preserve a food supply in quickly growing cultures. By claiming it was for god, the priests of the time were able to get their followers to not eat for a period of time. Fasting came in handy when food supplies were low. This is still a problem in parts of the world, so fine fast, but in reality what are you solving in most industrialized countries. To Be Continued................. If you have something to contribute or rebute feel free to email me.

I like a really great cup of coffee... But I guess I won't be drinking Starbucks anymore!!!! Recently Marines in Iraq wrote to Starbucks because they wanted to let them know how much they liked their coffees and to request that they send some of it to the troops there. Starbucks replied, telling the Marines thank you for their support of their business, but that Starbucks does not support the war, nor anyone in it, and that they would not send the troops their brand of coffee. So as not to offend Starbucks, maybe we should not support them by buying any of their products! I feel we should get this out in the open. I know this war might not be very popular with some folks, but that doesn't mean we don't support the boys on the ground fighting street-to-street and house-to-house. If you feel the same as I do then pass this along, or you can discard it and no one will never know. Thanks very much for your support. I know you'll all be there again when I deploy once more. Sgt. Howard C. Wright 1st Force Recon Co St Plt PLT PLEASE DON'T DELETE THIS . . ALLOW IT TO BE PASSED TO ALL IN MEMORY OF ALL THE TROOPS WHO HAVE DIED SO THAT WE MAY HAVE THE RIGHT TO CHOOSE TO SUPPORT THEM OR NOT! ! ! JUST A NOTE TO THIS : STARBUCKS "HAD" STORES ON SEVERAL MILITARY BASES IN THE UNITED STATES, WHICH ARE NOW BEING REMOVED BECAUSE OF THIS. GO GET'EM AMERICA STANDUP FOR OURSELVES Also, don't forget that when the Twin Trade Towers were hit, the firefighters and rescue workers went to Starbucks because it was close by for water for the survivors and workers...and Starbucks charged them!!!

Ok, so today I went and hung out with a friend that I have not seen in a long time. It was an awesome day, to bad it did not last longer. Lunch was cool, had Chipotle which ranks way up there with my favorite places to eat. Then went to the movie theater. At the theater, a challenge was laid down. It was fast and furious tokyo drift. Allright so first Round Anna basically kicked my ass on it. Second round I almost caught her at the end. i was winning for a minute, but she took that away. Oh well, the challenge has been laid for the future. After that we played some shoot the shit out of people games. Then the movie. This was awesome Reminded me so much of when I was a kid. I was having childhood flashbacks etc. It was amazing really. I laughed quite hard at times during the movie. I am so happy that the kids today will get to appreciate some of the same characters that I did when growing up. Now sitting here watching movies, first train spotting which was crazy but amazing. Now watching the new Resident Evil. Mila is in it.

No football for me today. Nope none at all. I got up early as shit and went to Wally World. I got home and hung some pictures up which was cool as shit. I have some nice new art work hanging including pics of my High School and Frostburg State. Two of the placest hat really formed me. Then we went to The most awesome chink chow restaraunt ever to get some mongolian buffet. Then to Cold Stone. Now sitting at home drinking some good itailian wine with Dawn. Overall an awesome night. BTW I now like Wine, that sucks cause i can drink too much. It costs the same as a fifth of SoCo and has less affect.

oh the week ok, so this was a pretty damn good week. My kids did what they needed for the most part. Worked hard and actually are really putting their head to the pavement doing the work they need to. Friday was happy hour, went to Friday's with everyone and spent way too much money. That is always good. Got home after 10pm sometime. Met some new friends. Went to bed Today I went to a seminar on proving trigonometric functions in D.C. The speaker was amazing and really showed some new methods for proving functions based on the counting principle. So this makes some proofs very elementary. I liked it enough to buy his book. Talked to Jamie for a bit on aim, have not talked to her for a couple of weeks. That was good. tonight going to Rocket to Venus to chill and drink some brews. That will be fun. Tomorrow going to read this book and write a review on it for Morgan State. Hopefully get it published in the newsletter.

Ok, so all the sudden I want to hit some shows up. So in January I will be hitting up the following Sick of It All and Madball together The Black Dahlia Murder and 3 inches of blood In February The Supersuckers, with Eddie Spaghetti doing a solo set In March Flogging Molly I might also go see Wyclef Jean in January but have not decided yet on that one. I really want to go see WuTang Clan, but for $55 I can do several other shows. Have not decided yet on that one. Maybe, but that is this week. So this weekend well, blah. The Steelers lost, which sucks major ass. I drank a fifth of SoCo friday night and still was not hammered, which is somewhat scary. Last night I went to Playbook to watch the game then to Memories Strip Club, hey when its a night out, its a night out. Was not a bad night other than getting lost in Dundalk. Getting ready for work tomorrow, gotta get some stuff out for the students to work on for their project.

Puff Puff Pass haha Joking ok, so sitting here watching Snoop Dogg Puff Puff Pass pounding down some damn So Co. I just realized that the bottle that was new starting the night is now empty. The worst part about all that is I am still typing normally. Yeh, sad thing. So anyhow week in review. Since it is now Saturday I can reflect. Friday was Jim's birthday, so happy birthday man. You are almost like a brother at this point. Today the kids were good it was awesome. I am loving my job right now, which is quite unusual for this time of the year. I truthfully now can say I am in the right field. Thursday one of my friends came over for a while, I made some bad assed dinner. I don't know what the road may lead, but I am still up in the air on that piece. Wednesday I chilled, I was not looking forward to going back but it has worked out.