MacBLS Ohio Chapter's blog: "present.....?"

Waking up without the feeling of purpose. Without the feeling of just being.. like a dream you just can't wake up from.. then you wake.... you realize you did in fact lose everything. you wonder about your friends, your family.. where do you run to? do you run at all? you question yourself about everything you once knew... about who you were.... did it all matter? did anyone care? being lost in yourself is like being lost forever.. then you realize.... you were never found...

today like every other day i tried. tried to be who i am tried to be different tried to be who i should be... in the end it's who you really are as a person as a friend as a human being.... will we ever learn will we know who we are? can we be who we really are? i don't think we can really....

when you think life is real it's not. i see things as they are. bleak. absent. so i try. and try again. like we all should. to make life real... and in the end fate should reward us all.. to live happy..... to live the way we should... to hold what we have and cherish it... to have family,friends, and lovers, is that possible? .....yes it is.

to not understand is like not caring... to not feel when someone hurts..... to be who you are..... to be lonely.. you will be.. to hurt someone with malice... to walk by in there dire straits... to ignore the needs they might have.. you will lose... to learn what it's like... to feel they're pain.... to crawl on the ground in the night... when all is lost.. will you know they're pain?