Just a reminder: I write poems like these to express the way I am feeling at a certain moment. Sure, most poets mean it but some use it as a way of expression. I use poetry to express my feelings and thoughts about things. Like it or not, I do this for those 2 main reasons.
This part of my poetry is based on my shitty love life. Yeah I know, sux huh?
"Bad Friday"
When I look back
At the words said
There was happiness
But also hurt and sadness
I can't help
But look at the times
How happy we once were
Is what I realized
Until the day came
Bad Friday
The fight began
And it went on, you won
I was dying
But was not actin'
Like a foot soldier
That was killed in action
Only one me
But so many demons
Now I feel sick
For all the dramatic reasons
I can't figure myself out
Not with the suspense going on
It would hurt me more
By trying to move on
I need to heal
And help myself out
It's the only way
I will without a doubt
The truth is this
I'm still hurtin'
Not because of you
But because of him
The old man roaring
It doesn't make things better
I only hope
Those things will get better
Better than this
Maybe much more
But that's all I can think
I can't write anymore
"Oh god, HELP ME NOW!!!!!"
I hide myself in a dark room
Thinking about what I should do
I'm sure she's doing the same as me
Wondering what's wrong with me
All I did was express how I feel
But I felt my heart drying
It hurt's so bad
I feel like crying
What can I do,
To make it better?
Write a romantic love poem,
Or write a sad suicide letter?
There's so much at stake,
I feel like braking down
Should I pack up and fly away,
Or just stay in this fucked up town?
There are friends on both sides
But enemies everywhere
I'd go out and tell them to die
But I am just not prepared
Where do I go from here?
What do I do now?
Can I make anything clear?
I don't know what to do now…
Emotions run through my flesh
Urges swim in my blood
I just feel like I want to die,
But then my loss would flood
Then again, would I really care?
Or am I too upset and confused
There's so much going on
I feel like I've made myself used
Help is what I asked for
But I got nothing in return
Such an answer was so poor
I need something I yern
Now she's worried about me
Because of my deadness
I can't try to make things better
And now I feel helpless
But am I dead
Or am I alive?
I know I feel gone
But I want to revive
I lived in the real world
But she lived in the free
I am from a cruel world
So just fucken let it be!
I know who I am
But you don't
And you say I need to change
But I don't!
I like the way I am
Its something you'll never understand
Either accept me for who I am
Or just let go of my hand
In alot of ways,
I'm stronger than you
I've went through hell
But not the same as you
Stop Convincing me
That I have problems
You sound like someone you hate
You're the one with the problems!
Your hurting is not my fault
Your hurting is all yours
All I did was try to help
But you denied it, oh well
I just want it to make it better
But it can't happen right now
I'm feeling a change of the weather,
Oh god, HELP ME NOW!!!!!
"I"
I lived in the real world
But she lived in the free
I am from a world
Where nothing is free
I know who I am
But you don't
You say I need to change
But I won't!
I am who I am
You'll never understand
Accept me for who I am
Or just let go of my hand
I care about others
I always have
I'm sure you do too
And I'm sure you have
I'm fighting for us
But I'm not changing
I know what I want
I'm just doing the arranging
I go through alot
Almost every week
I'm strong enough to overcome it
But you can't because you're weak
I fight for my life
I fight for you
But you don't
You never do
You have to fight
To have a future
It doesn't happen on its own
You got to take things further
In alot of ways,
I'm stronger than you
I've gone through hell
But not like you
Stop convincing me
That I have problems
I'm working hard
But you're bringing us apart
I've always told the truth
It's just something you're not used to
I've never lied to you
I've never done anything wrong to you
The cause of the pain
Has always been you
Yes it has been
Yes it's the truth
When you move on in life
You'll see what I mean
Then you'll start to realize
And you'll want to come back to me
What If I'm not there?
It means you're too late
I won't be there
So grow up, don't hate
Look back
At what you've done to me
Think hard about it
And you'll see what I mean
I did nothing wrong
So don't hate
Do the right thing
Before it's too late!
Do not
You'll lose me sadly
Do so
And you'll be happy
But don't chose me
Over your friends
You'll regret that
Until the end
"Pain"
You've hurt me
I've hurt you
What good does this do?
It doesn't do any, so true
You don't believe me
When I say I trust you
I've always trusted you
I just worry about you
I've analized your past
You don't see that
I'm trying to keep you
Out of harms path
But you won't let me
You're so full of pain
Drama surrounds you
It's such a shame
I've broken down
Because you
You're on your own
I can't help you
Do what you gotta do
I'll do the same
If things are different
Then I'm not to blame
Why don't you try
To give it a shot
Do or die
Give it all you got
Let go
Of your fears
The more dwelling
The more tears
If you can improve
Things will be better
From raining skies
To sunny weather
Don't stop
Until you're done
Make it to the top
No more pain done
I'm not finding a way
I'm telling the truth
Get used to it
Thats all I'm gonna do
"Let It Rain"
I've shown myself
How to set it free
I'll leave the future
And look at what I see
I am not afraid
To express my feelings
The way I was
Lead me to a new beginning
No worries
No fear
Just understand
What I hear
I've asked for help
I feel like I've found it
When I'm fully free from hell
I will go find it
No more pain
No more hurt
So let it rain
Just to be sure
"Demons"
6 days
7 nights
teared up
torn inside
So much gets to me
I've had it cold
When I tried to stay
I begin to fold
100,000,000 people
Only 1 me
I won't change at all
But this can't be
So much pressure
All because of my false moves
No one and nothing
Can figure out in my moods
Thoughts so depressing
I have broken down
But points so true
Now I face the ground
Demons linger
Inside of my body
I cry so hard
My tears turn bloody
My heart aches
My feelings bleed
Chains grip me
But they squeeze
Help is what I need
But then it's offered to
Then I need to set my demons free
Or seal them away too
Please help me
Please help me
Make my demons go away
But let the future stay
"The Habit"
Its the same thing
over and over again
But its stuck in me
Deep from within
Same words spoken
Day after day
There's the point of no return
Everything crashed and burned
Now I dont know
It feels like never
It's just a habbit
It may go on forever
Only I can control it
Only I can stop it
Only I can fix it
Not to change the wits
I can't help it
I've lost it
There's no point
In changing it
I'm a fool
I have to deal with it
It's nothing to others
But it's affective to me
"Moving On... For Now"
No more stress
No more conflict
No more wrongs
No more shit
Nothing to lose
Nothing to gain
It'll never be the same
But I'm not a shamed
I rather be friends
Than be nothing for now
Better be someone
Than be no one for now
But it feels good
The drama is done
The past was bad
But now its all done
No hard feelings
Just going on now
No other explanation
Just moving on... for now
I'll never forget
The good times
Because they will help
Until the end of time
If that chance comes
To come back together
That would just make us happier
We can make it last forever!
"Cloudy"
I do what I feel
Not what I'm told
I'll listen
But not withhold
Do I care?
About what he says?
Absolutely not
It's what she said
Her words feel so right
And I feel the same
We both fucked up
But I'm not the only one to blame
But what about her
What did she do?
I felt so bad
But now she feel's it too
I have so many questions
I want so many answers
But to do so
I must confront her
My heart beats greatly
My blood boil's like crazy
I hate to say it
But I think everything's hazy
I don't know what to think
My mind's too cloudy
Is there more to it?
All of this time I've been pouty?
Is it true?
Or is it not?
Or is there more
To what was sought?
Should I believe?
Or should I not know?
If there is something further
I need to know
What else did she do?
What else happened?
What else went wrong?
Answers are my only weapons
Do tell me
Do tell now
Think about it first
And you'll know how< P>
I felt like the wrong
And I lost you
But now you've stepped up
There's more you need to do
I question you
You answer me
No matter how hard
Do so truthfully
"Only Her"
I was blind
I didn't watch myself
Didn't pay attention
Just kept in to my little cell
Why did she go?
Where did I fuck up?
When my demons kicked in
I finally woke up
The pain caused
The lies told
Lead to tears
Then we cried
My mirror image
Once my reflection
Can't look at myself
It's now my lonely perfection
Why did it happen?
Where did my demons come from?
They got the best of me
Now I can't be forgiven
I lost her
I cried my tears
I faced the depression
But fought my fears
Now its happening again
A brand new start
Being supported
But being broken apart
No one else can have it
No one at all
Everyone else is not like that
I want her, thats all
Will I get her back?
Can't it work well?
Very questionable
But only time will tell
My life and love
My heart and soul
Belongs to her
And only her
She's my life
She keeps me on my feet
You know what else?
She makes me feel complete!
"13 Days…"
I still remember
That day and time
When hell broke lose
And crossed the line
Along the way
I've suffered
Don't know about you
But I let my feelings smother
Days have passed on by
And I've been trying to change course
All of this time
But it gets much worse
I can't handle it
It's just too much
I can't concentrate
With drama being shoved
I once had that feeling
Where it felt so good
That no matter what
I would improve if I could
Not for you
But for me
What have I been doing?
I've been listening
To you and your words
I respect them as much as you
For better or worse
They say there's something I can do
My focus has been
On me and myself
I went to you
When I needed your help
Just like you wanted me to
You offered your assistance
I didn't know what to do at first
But your help is a welcome presence
It's been hell for me
I'm feeling ill
Not because of you
There's no way you will
I feel so weak
And it's all because of him
The old man
I suffocate because of him
And it was not too long ago
That I would do things the way I felt
And it felt so good
But because of him I'm back in that hell
I can't fight it
There's just no way
I know I have to end it
But it's only been 13 days…