Mistress Mystic Fyre's blog: "Poetry: From Dark To Light"

People see the darkest point As that which haunts their life I say the bottom hits When your mind can not see the light My mind is tired of consequence Of a fault that's not my own For pain impressed upon me When respect is all that was shown I'm lost in thoughts unaccounted for That haunt my very soul I wonder where they've wandered to But I guess it's not for me to know I gave up too much of myself When there was nothing for me to do I let go of who I was Because I was scared of you Kick me, hit me Force me to scream Then cut off my air supply because you didn't want to hear me You've never had respect for me And i given you my best years All you given in return Is a lifetime of fear I'm done with you, It's over! I want to finally be me I want to smile again and laugh again And be the person I used to be I'm lost in thoughts unaccounted for They hurt my tortured soul I wonder where they've wandered to But I guess I'll never know I sit here now with tears streaming down My mind is tired of the fight Thank God my friends are with me To help make sure thing turn out right I can't stand the thought of you near me I don't want to hurt anymore I want to smile again freely And be the girl I always was before. I'm lost in thoughts unaccounted for That haunt my very soul I wonder where they've wandered to But I guess it's not for me to know

I smile and wonder what you're thinking Then I laugh because I will never know I guess I wonder why we click Then I let my mind slow To the thoughts that cloud my mind I wonder what to do I often wonder what I would feel If I ever gave up hope of finding you I miss our long talks over minutes That we shared so many years ago The little whispers of I love you That no one else would know The plans we used to make together The peace you gave to me I can't seem to find you now But you've always been the best you see It's been so long since I've heard your voice And the last time I did we had a fight I finally followed your advice love The pain has finally given way to light I never had a chance to take back The horrible things I said that day It has haunted me since then That I lost my love over things I had to say I miss you my best friend And I know you and Lisa are happy now I still can't get you off my mind And I often wonder how I used to find you so easily I used to search all the time I used to wonder when I would find you again I wanted you to be mine I still think about you Davey Even though I know we could never be I still miss our friendship The way it used to be I know we would never be lovers now But you were the first to have my heart I wish I could find you now I hate that our friendship is torn apart

Among the softly whispering winds I hear the Goddess call I raise my hands in defeat And yet she comforts all She wraps her winds around me And I feel the warmth of her touch I sense her holding me as I cry Because she cares for me so much She takes my hand in guidance And watches my every step I smile just thinking about it Glad that someone is there to help I can't believe I was lonely And felt like no one cared Because when no one else was listening The Goddess was always there I've found the one thing missing The thing I've never been able to find The one that stills my beating heart And sooths my hurting mind She takes my hand and guides me And makes me realize The only person I need to make happy Is the one I feel inside

Soft kisses at twilight Light touches in the moon I remeber your hands on me And how I had to leave too soon Happy laughter from just being Wraped up in each others arms I knew you would never hurt me That I would always be safe from harm I don’t know where you went to Or how I lost my way I thought I would always have you And that you would be here to stay I remember every breath you took I hear every whispered sound I can still feel your arms around me Though I know you’re not here now I opened up my eyes And it’s then you faded away The man who haunts my dreans Is never far away I wake up wondering why I can’t find you Flesh and blood and bone As much as I look for your haunting eyes In this world there is none

I can feel your hands upon my face I feel myself in your embrace The wind kisses my lips for you I am surrounded by you I can feel you all around me I can feel your icy stare I know you are right here with me I can sense you there I catch of whiff of your perfume The one I always made you wear I knew if I needed you to hold me You would always be there I can feel you still my love Even though you are long gone But as long as there is breath in me My heart will always hold on I miss you my darling With all my heart and soul I cry out for you again And I can feel you take hold I sense your fingers in my hair Lightly touching my tear stained face I wrap myself in your spirit now And die happy in your embrace I've waited so long for you To come and take me to where you are I never lost my memory of you When you died inside that car I watched over all the children I dreamed you beside me ever night I may have married another But you were always in my sight Its been 25 years now That I missed your loving soul Take my hand now my love So we can be together and go Heaven awaits my darling We can be together there Our children have grown and understand The burden they must bear My darling wife I love you You always had my soul I was so lost without you near Now I will never let you go

Fading darkness hides the faults That whisper in my mind Of love that is all beyond my reach And where my heart is entwined I dream of lovers not far off That have settled in their life When the spark has faded and doubt creeps in And the love is wrought with strife I bounce upon the night wind And whisper in their darkest dreams This is not what you are needing This is not love as it seems Bow before the Goddess As she guides your heart in love Release your inner spirit Let her take it from above Whisper with the winds as Gaia Releases you from your lover's spell For if you stay in the arms of your heaven It shall become the darkest hell A pit of dispair will find you Love has abandoned you in her eyes There will be nothing but pain in your heaven And no sound but thunder in your skies Release the self doubt you hold my dear Hold fast to the truths you have been told You are a wonderful guy my dear She is not the one you need to hold Reveal the true self you are hiding Stand tall and strong as you should Around you there is laughter and loving Embrace the love that will bring nothing but good You fear your self worth for no reason You have no need to bear a burden such as that You are an awesome person truly Not flattery, Simply stating a fact Stand Tall, Stand Proud You have come so very far Why settle for what doesn't make you happy When you are worth ever so much more!

The words came to me today To say the things I want to say to fill my heart with hope again That somewhere out there are good men The though went through my mind today Of how I wantt things to go my way But what else can I really say Except I guess there is no one there I look, but can't connect I push away everyone I cling to now I want to have a meaningful relationship The only question is how How do I let myself love again How can I trust a man The amount of men I actually trust I can ccount all on one hand How the hell do I do it Knowing that there is the chance of getting my heart broke Feeling the fear rise inside me As all my hopes go up in smoke Are there any good guys left in vegas Who actually want to know me for me Who aren't players or attention whores Like most of the men I meet From Jokers to smokers to motorboat captains From preppies to punks and everyone in between They are all sluts and kings in their own mind And I'm being honest, not even trying to be mean I want to find a good guy in Vegas Who doesn't mind cuddling and watching a movie Who doesn't try to seduce me on the first date But likes to smile and laugh and wants me to be me I don't think they exist at all Maybe I'm not looking in the right places Either way it doesn't matter I shouldn't even think about dating Since I am looking for a man of character Who wouldn't even think of cheating Even when the toughest times came Or he was thinking of retreating Besides who is going to want a single mother Who has to restrict her time with him That can't even make plans until the last minute Because she has to wait for her ex to make a decision Only a man with understanding And a heart that can accept the trials of mother I doubt he exists in Vegas Guess I will never know one way or another

Ive felt your arms around me~ ive touched your heart so near~ ive created a connection with you~ and tonite all i feel from you is fear~ im on the opposite end this time~ im not the one saying goodbye~ im not the one who got attached~ im not the one forcing the friendship to die~ im left with an ultimatum~ ive never been good with a choice~ if he could only hear me now~ choose to listen to my voice~ i regret nothing we have done together~ im accepting my fate at your hand~ i would choose to still love you as a friend~ but i cant and i understand~ i still trust you with my life dear~ and my memories you cant take~ but i will try to look happy my dear~ i dont believe anything was a mistake~ as we part our separate ways~ know i will think often of you~ because of everything we have shared as friends~ i can honestly say i love you as a best friend too

Can you feel me outside your window Running through your mind Can you feel me within your heart Trying not to cry Can you sense the pain Running through my vains As you just walk away Why aren't you here with me Why can't you feel me call I drop to my knees in pain Were you ever here at all I can sense your heart beat breaking I can feel your touch on my face I can feel you wipe away my tears And take me in your embrace One more time we have One more touch before your gone All the memories of passing years All the thoughts of what went wrong Why aren't you here with me Right where you belong Where I can hold you tight and break you free Together listening to the angels song Why can't they take me instead Why do you have to go Why can't I go with you love I don't want to live alone I feel your last breath of life And my heart grows cold inside As you leave this world my love I feel my soul has died I touch your soft lips once more And I cry out to the world I lift my eyes to the heavens And let my rage be unfurled How dare you God take this man From my loving care How dare you Fates cut his string When he was always there Why aren't you here with me Why can't you feel me call I drop to my knees in pain Were you ever here at all These are the moments of innocence Lost to darkness now Pain makes way for life again Though we never will know how.

I have decided to post some of my poetry on Fubar. Laugh if you want, Cry if you must, Curse if you will, but at least read it and let it touch your heart.