Beth's blog: "Poems"

Doubts I have

they care me away

the fear of what maybe

I know they also

drive you crazy

when I tell them to you

Forgive me 

for they are not 

meant to hurt you

I thought if we both knew

what they were

we could handle them

together as one

My mistake

for they are only 

MY doubts and fears

There really no reason

for them to be here

A constant fight

with the feeling with in

A battle that one day 

I hope to win

Patience is a virtue

I lack in spades

Most difficult virtue

to gain

Time is what passes

me by 

Especially when I doubt

my heart

Patience and time

go hand in hand

When it comes to 

my hopes and dreams

All things in their time

and not before

This is what makes

Them worth so much more

I lose my way

more often than I'd like

Mostly when it comes to you

and my dreams last night

How long must I be denied?

The love I gave so freely 

You take without question

I stand by you

even when I am not there

You left standng me alone

as if you do not care

You hardly say a word

just a poke me here and there

A hug or a heart

sometimes a smile

Cast me aside 

if I mean nothing to you

Just tell me before you do

Sitting here on my bed...thinking about what you said..my heart is breaking...you left me shaking...I am tired of the games...alone with no answer...We are just a disaster...whatever happens happens...I am to confused...it is all cuz you don't know what to do...I am here as a friend..always until the bitter end.

I might be broken...I will be just fine...the life I live is now mine.

I want you to find happiness

The joy of being you

Thank you for letting me in

No my life alone

Shall truly begin!

I know where I stand with you.....friends and nothing more....something brings me back to you....yet there is nothing I can really do...I hide my feelings...so that you do not see...exactly what you mean to me...I say just friends...keep things hidden...no one will ever know...keep it to myself...admire from afar...

I have been murdered..

thrown to the ground...

beaten, kicked, and stabbed.

Left bleeding...

no remorse...

nothing left...

NOTHING!!

Lying dead...

no longer beating...

what is this cold feeling?

What happened I cannot explain...

nothing left but a shell...

no more tears...

no more pain...

no more fear...

no more of anything...

You are to blame...

took what I gave...

crushed what was left..

killed the very thing

that I had held dear

I was murdered

I no longer breath.

There is a hole in my chest

Where my heart used to rest

Torn out and ripped apart

Shredded into unmendable pieces

There is a hole in my chest

Where my heart used to rest

I did my best to keep it safe

However there is nothing left

Just this hole

In my chest.

You weren’t the one

I gave too much

You gave to little

It was hard to see

But baby you weren’t the one for me

It is hard to take

Feeling my heart break

Crying rivers of tears

All that’s left are doubts and fears

I hope and pray that I will find my way

Into a new and brighter day

I am moving on

No matter how much it hurts

To realize that 

Baby....you weren't the one!

Some say there is no future

for you and me

So why bother trying

With all this doubt

I feel like dying

I do not know 

what the future may bring

All I know is 

"I love you"

My heart wants to sing

I am going to fight

So all of you haters

Back the fuck off

Get out my head

He is my future, my heart

I am not letting go

They say the distance

will break us

There is no way 

We can make it

Communication and honesty

Patience and faith

I will stand beside you

for as long as it takes

My doubts must drive you crazy

How did I get you?

You say "You did, why ask why?"

These so called friends got my head spinning

With words of "goodbye"

All I know is that

"I love you"

My heart wants to sing

All you haters back the fuck off

He is my future, my heart

And together, 

WE WILL WIN!

What is behind your eyes?

I see something

Yet I do not know what to say

Is it pain, sorrow, hate, lust, anger?

So many things can be hidden

You never say a word

I am not afraid

Of what you might be hiding

Unsure of who to trust

What I am going to say is true!

I just want to get to know you

I want nothing but your friendship

I will not lie or talk behind your back

I am that way

I am here if you would like to talk

Just say “hi”