K, where to start...
Have you ever loved someone so much that it hurt? Have you ever had feelings for someone and they dont have them back or wont tell you they have them. Well that is what is going on with me. I love this person with all my heart and soul and in my heart I know it is supposed to and meant to be. But they have this problem with saying how they feel. For a while we were really happy together then things went bad. Life through rough spots at us, and instead of working through them, he gave up and walked away. Now time has passed and we both have learned from our mistakes, but 400 miles are between us and I am willing to try again, but he is not. No matter how much I try and show him I love him, he shows no signs of wanting to be together again. Instead its a constant reminder that things went bad in the past. Well I see it as the past is the past, if you can learn to forgive one another for bad choices then why hold it against them. When you love someone, the way I love him, you show them that love. You show them that the falling in love is better than the being in love. And no matter how hard it is to forgive someone for mistakes, when you love them you are willing to try. I wish someday, when he is done talking to other girls and telling them they are beautiful and not showing me the same respect, that he will come back around. Until then all I can do is keep getting hurt by him. I want him so bad in my life that I'm lost without him. I know he is the one for me and I am the one for him. And no matter what has happened or what will happen in the future I want him to know that my heart will always be his.
I know he will read this, and Im cool with that. These are feelings that he doesnt want to listen to when I try and tell him, so maybe he will do better to read them and stop and think about how it used to be with us. Maybe he will think again before he calls another girl beautiful but not show me the same respect. I dont know, I can only hope.
