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It is starting to get a little hazy for me, but I will try to recall the night *dum dum dummmmm* of the HOT DOG!!!!!
My best friend Sandi and I have gone to the same little hole in the wall bar for 10 years... ohhhhh the memories we have...anddddd the stories!!
It started out as a regular night, Friday night out with friends. The bar owner was in an ornery mood and decided that we needed to fork our friend Bobs' yard. Well of course we were game for that! What meeture 46 year old woman wouldn't? I mean really????? So 7 of us piled in two cars and trolled on over to Bob's place, mind you we have toilet papered his yard several other times, but the lil bastard got smart and cut the damn tree down, so we had no choice but to Fork him. We had plastic forks, spoons and knives in hand, ready for some fun. Here we all are out in Bob's yard in the dark plunging plastic utensils into the patchy muddy grass. *gasp* the motion light goes off... shit we have no where to hide.. the dumbass took our tree away!!!! We wait a few minutes and it goes off, so we continue. Ohhhh shitttt the porch light comes on and we all run.. mind you.. the ages range from 61 down to 22. yeah yeah.. us old broads don't run as fast, I realize that nowwwwwww. Moral of the story, when someone turns on the porch light and you are standing right next to the door, when told you were busted... don't say.."wha"!! He didn't fall for it... that got Bob's ass up to the bar.. and it went down hill from there...*dramatic pause*
Earlier in the day they had a cook out with hotdogs, why of course!!! It was Royals home opener... uh huh..... well by the time we got back it was after 10 and we wanted a hot dog. I lifted the tinfoil on the pan and what stared me in the eye, but a dried up shriveled up, bent up burnt to a crisp and hard as a rock hot dog. Well I promptly put one on a plate for Sandi and told her i brought her some dinner... *blank stare* she wasn't impressed.. well that ungrateful biotch!!! yeah yeah.. things get worse...I ran out to smoke and when I came back in I went to check my cell phone in my purse. I pulled out one hot dog... then two.... dug around some more and pulled out another and another and another and another...BIOTCHES!!!! I knew that couldn't be all.. I have known these evil people wayyyy too long. I reached down into each sleeve... whewww noo hot dogs....but when I reached into my pocket... guess what I found???? HOT DOGS!!!!!! 4 in all......I'm like ok... I'm sure I might deserve that a bit..ya know.. pay backs are hell....but when I was sippin on my drink and a hot dog bobbed up and hit me in the nose... it was ON!!!!!! I put hot dogs in Donna's cigarette case, and her drink.. then I moved on.... ohhhh I see Myra with a bottle of beer... perfect size for a dried up, shriveled up, bent up burnt to a crisp hot dog from helllllllllllllllllllll!!!!!! Ohhhh I'm sounding bitter huh? We double teamed Sandi and filled her dart case, drink and her purse with hot dogs. By the end of the night I felt revenge was mine!!!!!! even the bartender let me take my tip with a hot dog wrapped inside of it and put it between her boobals... woohooo some action!!!!
