SORRY FOR SUCH A MUSHY BLOG BUT AFTER THE HUGE ARGUMENT WITH MY SON I NEED TO VENT.
Current mood: sad
Category: Life
My Dear Son
You are my Heart, My Soul, My Reason for breathing. I know at times you feel that I am hard on you or that I ask alot of you, and for this I am sorry. But I want you to know that I Love You so much and just want whats best for you and for you to be happy. Something that every Mom wants for her children. I may have played a roll in some things that have happened in your life that you mightnot be happy about but for this I am sorry. But I just want you and everyone else to know that you are my Life. And lately I just feel like I am losing you. I know you are 18 now well 19 in 9 days so you are a man now, but to me you will always be my baby and I want to protect you from all the hardship and things life might throw your way. Some people say let you live your life, let you make mistakes you will learn from them and as true as this maybe, it's just hard cause all your life it's always been just me and you. I accept the choices you make in your life. And I will stand beside you through all of them good or bad. Happy and Sad. But at the end of each night before you go to sleep just remember how much I LOVE YOU. And why I say or do the things I do. And sometimes you take things the wrong way or I might even say them wrong but that doesnt mean anything my love for you will never change. Here are 2 poems for you I didnt know which one to post so I am posting them both. But let me also say I am sorry if I ever said anything to hurt you or your feelings.
I think after our conversation today I needed to say this to you:
It's hard sometimes, when people are changing their lives
To understand each other or even talk
You are struggling right now for independence
and to live your own way...
And sometimes I struggle for the strength to let you do it
I wish now and then for the days when a kiss and hug
could make your worlds bright again
but your world is more difficult now
and you want to make your own way in it
which is as it should be
I want you to know that when you get hurt
I will hurt with you
and that deep down, I will always have confidence
in your ability to find your place in your world
When you need a caring heart
or someone to listen to your deepest dreams or concerns
I will be there for you because I love and care for you. Chris you are not only my Son You are My Best Friend. And there is not a day that goes by that I am not proud of you and to say that you are my Son.
I Love You Always and Forever, MOM
And here is the other one:
FROM THE MOMENT YOUR WERE BORN
I KNEW WHAT LOVE WAS REALLY ABOUT
I LOVED YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING
BEYOND THE SHADOW OF A DOUBT
THE BOND I FELT WAS UNBREAKABLE
AND INSTANTLY I KNEW
THAT I WOULD SPEND MY LIFE
THANKING GOD FOR YOU
TIME HAS QUICKLY PASSED US BY
AND NOW YOU'RE A YOUNG MAN
BUT IN MY EYES YOU WILL ALWAYS BE
MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BABY
ONE DAY IN THE FUTURE
GOD WILL BLESS YOU WITH A MIRACLE TOO
THEN YOU WILL KNOW THE DEPTH OF LOVE
THAT I WILL ALWAYS HAVE FOR YOU
I WILL BE HERE FOR YOU ALWAYS
AND FOREVER AND A DAY
LOVING YOU UNCONDITIONALLY
EVERY STEP ALONG THE WAY
WHAT I WOULD DO FOR YOU
I WOULD DO JUST ABOUT ANYTHING FOR YOU ASK, FOR YOU THERE'S NOTHING I WOULDN'T DO I WOULD HOLD YOUR EVERY MINUTE OF EVERYDAY, BUT I WON'T BECAUSE I KNOW YOU NEED TO FIND YOUR OWN WAY. I WOULD TAKE ALL THE HEARTACHE OF YOUR FIRST LOVE THAT'S REAL. EVEN THOUGHT I CAN'T I'DE FEEL THE PAIN YOU FEEL. I WOULD SELL MY SOUL IF IT WOULD KEEP YOU HAPPY FOREVER. I WOULD GIVE MY RIGHT ARM IF IT WOULD KEEP US TOGETHER FOREVER. I WOULD RUN A UNDRED MILES IN THE RAIN, IF I COULD JUST GUARANTEE THAT YOU WILL NEVER FEEL PAIN. I WOULD LAUGH WITH YOU EVEN IF I WAS SAD, I WOULD GIVE YOU A SMILE EVEN IF I WAS MAD. I WILL GUIDE YOU THRU LIFE WHEN IT GETS WILD JUST DONT EVER FORGET THAT YOU ARE MY CHILD.
LOVE YOU CHRIS EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE A YOUNG MAN YOU WILL ALWAYS BE MY BABY.
