A lot of people keep telling me that this year is going well for me. Really fucks me off when they say that, like they totally forget everything that's happened and I could do the same.
You know that The Damned song, 'I Just Can't Be Happy Today'? that's been me really for 2007.
2006 was a great year for me, I was such a happy positive person, I honestly believed that anything was possible. Never thought I'd be right.
I feel like I'm losing tough with people. My relationship with my grandmother which used to be quite mother/daughter.. has now become non-existant. It's all down to me though, I know it's my fault but I don't want to change it. Nice. That's exactly what I'm getting at, people used to be able to tell me that I'm a great person and I'd believe them. Now I know for a fact that I am a nasty, spiteful, pessimistic piece of shit. So I can't believe them. I won't believe them.
I can admit I am good at certain things, like drinking, writing, hair color lol.
~The trouble with drinking is it smells of you~
My friends want to get me and this guy out on the same night for a drinking battle. It's nice to know I have my uses.
Instead of constantly seeing years of emptiness, I actually have a few things I'm looking forward to;
1. Tattoo chest piece for birthday
2. My pirate birthday party
3. Going to USA again in June
4. My hair being completed.
5. University in Sept.
That's positive. I may be empty, but I don't belive my life future is. I also belive I have a future now.
End Note: I thought best friends were supposed to be like a sister? I always thought mine was for past 10 years. Now I'm not so sure.
Also, I love girls bitchy ways. Sure, I never responded nor spoke to anyone for months online. I had reasons. Everyone knew that. Especially one person - but now to be ignoring my calls/texts/messages...finally sending me a message saying she didn't receive any and if she did she was too busy to respond anyway...yet writing about 5 longass blogs on her boring life.
Ah whatever, like I said, not asif I'm the friendliest person right now anyways.
