Am I alone in this? You meet someone, get totally in sync with that person... Maybe date for months, years, even get married... but eventually you just get bored. it's not even the same as falling out of love, more like you wake up one day next to someone you never really liked in the first place... and think to yourself, WTF am I doing here???
I feel like I've been through this so many times, I am afraid to care for anyone. Afraid to love. Like even if I think I do, I would just end up being the cold hearted b*tch who walked out one day... forever unsure of my own feelings, doomed to be alone with sporadic deep relationships (but realistically meaningless) until I'm not pretty enough to get a guy anymore, then the loneliness of being isolated and alone will set in?
What is my relationship attention span? 2 years? 3? Do I use it up too fast? If I slow down the roller coaster that is my heart, can I make it last forever? Or is it just the simple process that most people go through in life, find someone to love you, convince yourself you love them too, then realize that you don't...
Is fate real? Does true love at first sight really mean something? Will I someday meet "the one" and just know it? Is there someone out there just for me? Someone who won't let the roller coaster stop, but keep it going with all the excitement of discovery and romance?
