Maelbolgia's blog: "Mental Trappings"

I suffer beautifully. I wish my wings could take me home. To be with the one I love. I wish my heart could be as one. As it was and since been forgotten. I wish my words could carry me Back to where I was before. I wish my heart would cease to beat and squelch this love once more. I wish my eyes could gaze upon your beauty and your grace that I may stand proudly again in my angelic grace. I suffer beautifully.

Asphyxiated. Smothering Saturated feelings of loss. Asphyxiated Cut off from the air I breathe. Depredation Energy transformed. Annihilation Transmogrification of emotion. Relinquished Thoughts of prosperity put off. Diminished The words cannot describe. Destruction A war upon ones self. Futility The art of preparations.

Today I made quite the profound discovery indeed. I had never realized until daydreaming about the beach that I had witnessed an actual "Epiphany". Now here it is. Check this shit out. We are taught there are but 4 elements. Earth, Wind, Fire and Young.. I mean Water. yeah wow that showed my age didn't it. anyway.. now this Revelation here showed me there are actually 8 elements and I'm hypothesizing more. The Discovery of the 8 Elements. Saturday, July 08, 2006 9:35am. The 8 natural elements. 1: Earth 2: Wind 3: Fire 4: Water 5: Carpet 6: Smokes 7: Electronics 8: Coffee After my recent discovery of the 4 new elements I had to revamp the astrological chart in order to put things as they should be. Correctly. Aries - Element: Electronics. Your a genius with a remote. The Ram. Why? Because you always have to but heads with everyone always thinking your right. Taurus - Element: Carpet. You make a great housekeeper. The Bull. Why? Because your so totally full of shit and everyone knows it. Gemini - Element: Smoke. Put down the crack pipe. The Twins. Why? Because your schizophrenic and can never decide between which personality is in charge. Cancer - Element: Coffee. Might be the cause of your crabby disposition. The Crab. Why? Because your general demeanor is that of a crab. People might mistake you for menopausal or constipated. Leo - Element: Electronics. Yes your pink cell phone is pretty. The Lion. Why? Because of that outrageous 80's hair style you refuse to get rid of. People often find the best surf in your hair. Virgo - Element: Carpet. Stop carpet sharking that's cat litter not crack. The Virgin. Why? Because Virgos like to pretend they are something they truly are not. You are often found behind the bar or any convenient place giving it up for free. Libra - Element: Smoke. Pass the bong your camping. The Scales. Why? Most Libras tend to be drug dealers and often are found to be very snakelike or reptilian in behavior. Scorpio - Element: Coffee. Edginess does not suit you try a warm glass of milk. The Scorpion. Why? Because you feel it's easier to just say "fuck you" than "thank you" fuck is 4 letters and thank is 5. Sagittarius - Element: Electronics. Your vibrator needs new batteries try conservation. The Archer. Why? Because your always bending over ready to take it in the ass. Capricorn - Element: Carpet. Stop staring at the floor it's not going anywhere. The Goat. Why? Because you are far too stubborn and never right anyway you just don't get it is all. The rest of us do. Aquarius - Element: Coffee. Get me a beer bitch. The Water Bearer. Why? Get me a beer bitch and find out. Pisces - Element: Coffee. Have you paid your bar tab lately? The Fish. Why? Because you drink like one or can be often mistaken for having had drank far too much.

When a scream can no longer define the rage. When words can no longer tell the story. When all has failed to become prosperous and the things one sought now become surreal and unreachable. When the time that once gave peace now gives turmoil and discontentment. When every last breath is held back that one may not breath forth the fire burning inside. When the only images one sees are covered in red and the red will fade no more. When the rage inside becomes overwhelming. When the blood boils and the calm has gone. Then and only then may you understand what torment is. Then and only then may you see what it is to be me.

My soul churned in the coals a fire out of control choked out burning never enough oxygen to breathe. Buried darkness lit with fire as the shadows dance mockingly upon the walks of my heart tainted with the inner light the dimly lit shadows perhaps they dance for the sake of dancing, sedation the inner desires we find lost to the needs of the day found in the darkness with the dancing flames of a fire once burnt bright. The dimly lit cavern of my soul.

Night had settled in and the light blotted out by a chilling sort of unnatural darkness something stirred within. For years it had laid in wait for the opportunity to be released once again, to roam free and unbound by the chains which held it in it's solitude. Confined from reaching out and destroying that which laid in it's path The Great Beast moaned in delight as the shackles loosened ever so little, bit by bit, one step closer to freedom and revolution. The cycle had been cut off incomplete and left The Great Beast starving in it's wake. Hunger now struck with the sounds of thunder and his heart raced within his hollow chest pumping the blood of the damned thought his dried veins. To feel again, to be again, to rule again. Through the darkness The Great Beast saw opportunity, an opportunity to take control and vanquish the keeper of the keys that belonged to his ancient shackles. To drink the blood of the keeper would be his first task. To feel his heart beating in his hands as he devoured the precious organ in witness of his captor. To smile upon the face that had cast him down to his imprisonment and to look deeply into the eyes that had cast judgment upon him. Slowly and without hesitation The Great Beast arose letting out a deep gust of stale breath as the air of freedom came upon him so fresh and inviting. A smile came across his face and his teeth shown crusted with the sins of the past devoured he could not wait to sink them into new flesh once again. A single tear fell from the eye of The Great Beast in mourning of what was to come once again.