This is for those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating marriage - under the assumption that men should be trained for marriage. A new two-year degree is being offered at the University of Marriage that many of you should be interested in. That's right, in just six semesters, you too, can be a real man as well as earn an MA degree (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline. FIRST YEAR Spring Schedule: MEN 101: Combating Stupidity MEN 102: You, Too, Can Do Housework MEN 103: PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut MEN 104: We Do Not Want Sleazy Under Things for Christmas Summer Schedule: MEN 110: Wonderful Laundry Techniques MEN 111: Understanding the Female Response to Getting In at 3am MEN 112: Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception EAT 100: Get a Life, Learn to Cook EAT 101: Get a Life, Learn to Cook II ECON 001A: What's Hers is Hers Fall Schedule: MEN 120: How NOT to Act Like a Jerk When You're Wrong MEN 121: Understanding Your Incompetence MEN 122: YOU, the Weaker Sex MEN 123: Reasons to Give Flowers ECON 001C: What Was Yours is Hers SECOND YEAR Spring Schedule: SEX 101: You CAN Fall Asleep Without It SEX 102: Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower SEX 103: How to Stay Awake After Sex MEN 201: How to Put the Toilet Seat Down (Elective) (See Electives Below) Summer Schedule: MEN 210: The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency MEN 211: How to Not Act Younger than Your Children MEN 212: You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver MEN 213: Honestly, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise MEN 230A: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important Fall Schedule: MEN 221: Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary MEN 222: Real Men Ask for Directions MEN 223: Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay MEN 230B: Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important II COURSE ELECTIVES EAT 101: Cooking with Tofu EAT 102: Utilization of Eating Utensils EAT 103: Burping and Belching Discreetly MEN 231: Mothers-in-law MEN 232: Appear to Be Listening MEN 233: Just Say "Yes, Dear" ECON 001C: Cheaper to Keep Her