Thunderbird110's blog: "Lost Points and friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

"One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures." -George W. Bush

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

After twelve years of therapy my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes. He said, "No hablo ingles."

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

When I was kidnapped, my parents snapped into action. They rented out my room.

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!