Kitty n Camies's blog: "lost and confused"

Going to start this out with a song that puts into words what I have not been able to do.. We've been friends for a long long time You tell me your secrets and i tell you mine She's left you all alone and you feel like no one cares But i have never failed you i've always been there You tell your story it sounds a bit like mine it's the same old situation it happens every time Can't we see oh maybe you and me is whats meant to be or do we disagree What if i told you -(what if i said) that i loved you how would you feel what would you think what would we do do we dare cross that line between your heart and mine or would i lose a friend or find a love that would never end what if i said She doesn't love you oh it's plain to see i can read between the lines of what your telling me and he doesn't hold you the way a woman should be held how long can i go on keeping these feelings to myself What if i told you -(what if i said) that i loved you how would you feel what would you think what would we do do we dare cross that line between your heart and mine or would i lose a friend or find a love that would never end what if i said oh we've both had our share of loneliness so who's to say we can't have a little happiness and if i found that in you it would make my dreams come true or would you walk away hear what i have to say What if i told you -(what if i said) that i loved you how would you feel what would you think what would we do oh do we dare cross that line between your heart and mine i've always wondered from that day that we met what if i said for way to long we have sat describing our bad relationships to each other and how its just better to be single and not worry about life so much.. does it ever occur to you that maybe just maybe we cant find happiness because we dont give each other a chance? someone out there knows exactly who this is for and why I say this..

OK going to vent a little in here tonight so let me get my soapbox... ok ... have you ever found yourself falling in love with someone that you know you shouldnt love?? maybe because you know they will never love you back or that they are with someone else??? Do you lay awake at night and think of them and dream about how things could be? Does it break your heart to know that happiness is just around the corner and you just cant touch it? Fear of rejection is a evil mistress. I find myself sometimes wondering what would happen if I just opened my mouth sometime and let everything I have inside out and see where it gets me... I have been hurt way too many times and I see happiness only a few steps away and yet my feet wont take me there.. so I turn and feel the tears as I walk away leaving the happiness and the better times behind me and I try not to look back.. there will be someone somewhere that doesnt take that much work and that much worry and there will be someone that will come for me not make me wait for them and when that day comes happiness will find me and I wont have to stand outside and watch it anymore I will be a part of it and it will be wonderful...

sometimes life throws curves at you that you just cant seem to hit no matter how hard you try... ever find yourself falling for someone at the wrong time? or looking back and going i was so stupid why didnt I take a chance when I had it? when you find someone that you care about take the fucking chance no matter what the risk cause if you miss that chance you may not get another one and then you have only to look back on things and wonder what might have been.. when you care tell them, when you love someone tell them, dont waste life you only live it once..