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Just some thoughts

Isn't it funny how someone can walk into your life and there is such a connection that it feels like they have always been there, by your side and in your heart? A friendship, that no matter the distance between you, strongly holds to hearts as close as can be. I had this kind of friendship before and it was cruelly taken away by fate. Never did I think that it was possible to share that connection with another person, but now I have that again with not one but two people, the man I am to marry and also my best friend. They both mean the world to me and I can't imagine ever being without them.

Not Fair...

First off let me just say that I know that life isn't fair and that it isn't supposed to be however there is no way in this world that one person is supposed to endure so much pain. I am loosing/have lost another person that I have held near and dear to me to Heaven. Now whether or not this place actually exists is a topic for another day but for my purposes at this very moment it does. It doesn't necessarily have to have the name Heaven, no I think I am going to call it Utopia for now as it is the perfect place to be. Too many of my loved ones are there, granted they are now at peace and are away from this world, away from the pain, and the hardships we all must continue to face daily. Cancer needs to be stopped....NOW! No one should have to fight that hard to live only to loose in the end!!! And the most wonderful thing about cancer....it doesn't just hurt and affect one person....it affects each and every person in the patients life! Each person endures the pain and strife while trying to "be strong." What a crock of shit! Over the past 3 years I have lost 9 people.... 9 PEOPLE THAT I LOVE. I'm done....after this I can't do it again....I'm going to bury my friend and pray that I can make it through this again.....

Pullin my hair out!

OK So here is my day thus far. I've spent the entire damn day arguing with someone...over my house, my sister, money....I've had enough. Today is one of those days that I should have stayed in bed with the covers pulled up over my head. My roommate was laid off today which is fan-fucking-tabulous....I think I am going to start doing shots so that I may possibly chill the fuck out a little before I beat the ever living hell out of someone or something.
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