OOH THE POSSIBILITIES greeter whiskey f...'s blog: "life and such"

well let's just say that i think this friend and i made up.  at least i am assuming we have.  i sent him another email, and he im'ed me, all mad and i gave it right back to him.   this was 2 1/2-3 weeks ago.

the conversation was changing i could tell when he said something about friends like me were hard to find and he never thought in a million years i'd do what i did to him.  i responded with the fact that i have regretted it since i did it and was only trying to make it right.

that's when he said he wanted to make it right and asked to call me.  we chatted for a bit, and i felt my world go right side up from being off kilter.  i still can't help the fact that his current girlfriend hates me, that much was evident when i got an im from her at the start of this month of april.  and he doesn't talk to me near as much as we did, and i am sure she is behind that, but hey, we are talking and we made up!!

Ok, so i am not perfect, who is? but i did the dumbest thing ever. i doubted a good friend for all of a few seconds but long enough to send an email that never should have been sent and when i realized my mistake, i sent an apology email to make up for it. but he saw the mean email before he saw the apology email and flipped out on me. i dont blame him i guess i would have too. but instead of giving me the benefit of the doubt and talking through it with me, he flipped out worse than i did and is now not speaking to me. we haven't spoken since february 21. i sent him another apology email on feb 22, short sweet and to the point. i apologized, let him know i was hurting, and wished him good luck on his future endeavors. haven't heard anything back. waiting is killing me since we used to talk on im or text each other every day. but i am doing what i told him i'd do in the last apology email and that is stand back. but its killing me!

You got a body like the devil and you smell like sex I can tell you're trouble but I'm still obsessed Because you know you're SO HOT I wanna get you alone (oh yes very alone) SO HOT I wanna get you stoned (not this part LOL) SO HOT I dont wanna be your friend I wanna fuck you like I'm never gonna see you again (yes please!!) > Yeaa Come on Yea You're like the kiss of death, like the hand of faith I can tell you're trouble but I still wanna taste Because you know you're SO HOT I wanna get you alone SO HOT I wanna get you stoned SO HOT I dont wanna be your friend [these lyrics are found on http://www.songlyrics.com] I wanna fuck you like I'm never gonna see you again Because you know you're SO HOT I wanna get you alone SO HOT I wanna get you stoned SO HOT I dont wanna be your friend I wanna fuck you like I'm never gonna see you again You're So Hot, I wanna get you alone I wanna get you stoned I dont wanna be your friend I wanna fuck you like I'm never gonna seeyou again See you again See you again KID ROCK BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!

yea the title says it all. life still sucks. i'm still in school doing what i want to and i get wednesdays to bowl for me time, but that's it. i have friends who only go out on the weekends and i can't hang out with them becuase i'm stuck here at my house. i think what really steamed me is that someone turned us into CPS for something that happened over a week and a half ago. i am pretty sure i know who it was. the CPS lady came in and made a comment that i needed to clean the house. she didn't even give a damn that the day before i'd been at school literally all day and hadn't even gotten to bed until late and i was tired and wasn't moving too much the next day. then she said that i should move out with my kids. i told her it wasn't financially possible at this time. she said give her a few days and she would look into stuff for me. then she went to the school and told my kid we were moving and my son is freaked out all the time about it. he keeps asking when we're moving, where we're going and if we're taking the dog or the fish with us. she hasn't even gotten information to help us find a place. i found that quite offending to be honest. i know and understand that CPS workers have to be somewhat hard, but when someone tells you that they were up for almost 16 hours straight, a little fucking sympathy would be nice. especially since i don't get any from home on my long days anyway. and the whole cleaning up the house comment was offensive too since she knows that i'm in school every day but fridays and i use fridays to recover from the long days. i had just told her that andrea doesn't help out at all around the house and then she started acting like it was my fault the house looked so bad. i was not impressed.

i would really like to know this. i've tried asking her to alternate weekends so i can go out and you would have thought i asked her to take a shower naked in subzero temps! she is so selfish and so self centered when it comes to herself and her husband that if it doesn't benefit them she won't do it. obviously me wanting a weekend doesn't benefit her so she won't do it. there is no solution. not even murder because i'd be in jail and he'd probably run off with the kids just to be an ass. i'm to the point where if i don't get out to release some stress i'm gonna take it out on her and it won't be pretty by any means!