i took a step into the broad-ranged view of the giant megaphone and it said "you are to set forth a fort night from now and march nine kilometers that way and slaughter the village of the dead baby pandas" and so i was sent on a mission from god on behalf of the devil but not before c except in words like neighbor and weigh. after many many many years of traveling i arrived at my appointed destination which was a meadow of sentient cacti engaged in exotic acts of worship towards a dead beached whale, I lit the dead baby pandas on fire and was shot down by a midget in a Santa costume that was mounted upon a trumpet with wings. captured, i realized i was, when i woke up in a soft cushioned cell, crazy i think they thought i was, but not for long, for i broke out of my cell because the door was made out of paper because i was lodged in china, and away i walked, never again to be seen by human eyes i now live with the giraffes in the wild, and live off of catnip and baby shoes, which if boiled together for 20 minuets, is the recipe for the cure to cancer. i must now go for my phone is ringing.....YEE-HAW!!!! But anyways, RAINBOW RANDOLF the purple midget believes that the dinosaurs were all radical satanic worshippers and that they believed if they all performed a mass suicide ritual, ALLAH would grant them eternal life, and that is why the dinosaurs are all extinct. I stole the stinky butt pirate's horde of cheesy catnip. I like pie. I like girls. One time I sacrificed my mom's baby while it was in the womb before I was born, RIDDLE ME THAT! And then it never happened and everyone was like "pie what?" The platupus had an enormous tail and the giraffe licked his purple in public, but it was censored so nobody actually saw it, so i cut the giraffe's leg off and gave it to the honor student at the school. Then he said the wicked witch of the south side was in the mirror and the apples and bananas were marching off to war with Gondor, so I gave him some acid and he was normal. His dad was shooting up with heroin up his ass with a turkey baster so I master debated his mom with a frying pan. When I finally woke up, not much had changed but the hairy ball of poof guy was still licking my shoes so I let sleeping dogs lie, unless they are lying to me, then I open up a can of kick the fucking dog. okay i'm gonna try and be serious now, in which is hard fer me. Hahaha But seriously did you just grab my ass? *raises eyebrow* Okay well i'm gonna leave you now, with one question and once you've found the answer , you will know the real meaning of life.......... If a fat chick takes off her cloths and jumps into a pool, is it still considered skinny dipping?? Ha!
