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PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WORDS! I KNOW IT SOUNDS A TAD DEPRESSING, EMOTIONAL AS WELL, BUT HONESTLY IT'S THE WAY MY MIND UNWINDS,
It's a wonderful thing to find a broken soul. the blood trickling down their eyes. no one can really see how decomposed they are inside. fulifilling their daily duties of smiling and being cheerful, just to satisfy those who surround them..it's all just a lie..filled with naive mediocre people, hypocritical in the best sense. those who choose to live just cause they have to, putting on a disguise everyday with no other way out..i dont want to see myself fall in the same vicious cycle of lies and deceit when in the end the one one get hurts, its the one thats been masking all the problems.me.I find myself sometimes so wrapped up in all the negative, that when something good coes along i cant really appreciate it.
And then i end up with nothng but a deep remorse for the wrong choices i've made. If everything happens for a reason, is that reason alwys have to be for the best, or for something that hurts instead? Sitting here makes me wonder on the many times i've decided to steer in a different way in my life, instead of being safe, i went for what seemed temting at the moment. and in the end it made me bleed words of dismay. contemplating on those choices now doesnt make them any less hurtful, nor do they just erase from my past, or weigh down on my future. Ranting on about being hurt and what not still doesnt change the fact that i'm still an object of fragile nature.
After letting go of some of the most stressing things this feeling that i have deep insde, of complete and utter lost of sense.. isn't gone. i cant, i just give up, and thats about the easiest way out but i could care less temptaion is what drives me. seduction is my best sport. satisfaction is my drug.
