Crazy Prophet AKA Midnight Dancer's blog: "Me"

My long term goal is to have a balanced relationship that is truly a team (in the fullest sense of the word) that will in turn contribute to all other areas of life. But what do I mean by the relationship being a team? It means that both people take full responsibility for themselves and each other, flowing power to each other. They are like a well-oiled machine, whether they are operating in tandem or individually. A constructive and fulfilling relationship with the ideal partner would be one in which both people are supportive of each other. This applies to group goals as well as individual goals and activities. They cover each other's backs, the strengths of one compensating for the weaknesses of the other. Yin and yang. I developed this list after evaluating past relationships and looked at what things were lacking for me. It is pretty certain that if things were lacking for me in the other person, then I also lacked things that they needed or wanted. We are who we are. Some puzzle pieces fit and some do not. In the list below are points that I look at when trying to determine if someone would be a good match for me. Everyone has different needs and wants. Whether someone fits doesn't mean they are good or bad as individuals, it is strictly a compatibility issue between two people. Some of the below points are "red flags" that I watch out for. Other are things that are important to me to some degree. Some of them are very subjective and can only be judged through my eyes. Everyone has good and bad days, I don't expect anyone to always be at their best. Either way, here is what I look for:

1. I am not looking for someone that is "not ready" for a serious relationship, or has been taking an extended break from dating because of "fear of getting hurt" or has issues being close or intimate.
2. I am not looking for someone that is constantly depressed or always angry about something. I want someone that is not “easily” made sad, or angry, but is normally cheerful and active.
3. Has a high spirit-of-play – in other words, has a playful attitude even when life isn’t being particularly fun.
4. Someone that can sometimes be enthusiastic or passionate about things, even little things.
5. Has no problem giving or receiving help. The ability to help others, and to allow others to help you is one of the most important qualities for a person to have.
6. A desire and a willingness to help improve social conditions, either locally or globally.
7. Can freely communicate on virtually any topic.
8. Is willing to talk through difficulties/disagreements rather than "avoiding" them or "giving in."
9. Lets me know right away if something bothers her; firmly but nicely.
10. Can evaluate the relative importances of things and operate accordingly. The one constant in the universe is change, when things change, sometimes priorities have to be adjusted.
11. Knows when to be firm and when to be flexible. Compromise is necessary in any relationship, at the same time there are things that you should not compromise on.
12. Able to hold her position – doesn't just go along to make everyone happy but keeps her integrity and her own views.
13. Someone with the ability to be both refined and unrefined, sophisticated and unsophisticated – able to operate comfortably at both ends of the spectrum, from helping me to work on a car to going to a play, symphony or opera.
14. Has class, though doesn't always need to behave that way. She knows how to be a lady, but isn’t snooty about it and knows how to relax.
15. Enjoys dressing up (whether with elegance, class, or sexily) and has no problem dressing down.
16. We should think in similar terms as far as religious/philosophy. That is a whole conversation in itself.
17. High intelligence.
18. Has book smarts (though not necessarily formal higher education) and some level of street smarts.
19. There should be magnetism between us (including mutual physical attraction).
20. We would need to be sexually compatible. Nothing to weird or deviant as far as sexual practices. Sorry to be too graphic, but no BDSM, anything involving injuring or humiliating anyone, and no anal.
21. Gets along well with my son. This is not hard to do, he is very likable and I don’t say that out of paternal biase.
22. Is not a jealous or suspicious person.
23. Is trusting and trustworthy.
24. Someone that, when they make a promise, they go out of their way to keep it.
25. Is caring and compassionate.
26. Knows how or is interested in learning how to ballroom dance. I love dancing, and of course I would want to be able to dance with my life partner. I would feel bad dancing with someone else, and so if she wasn’t into it, I would just end up not dancing. I don’t want that to happen.
27. High affinity for music, preferably enjoys singing, and some desire to create in this area.
28. Affinity for language and the written word. I am a writer. I love to read and to write. If I can not share any of that with my partner, I would end up having to spend a lot of time talking with someone else.
29. Someone that shares my sense of humor – puns, word humor, sarcastic/cynical/ironic/dry wit.
30. Enjoys movies of most types (including subtitled).
31. We operate on roughly the same aesthetic wavelength.
32. Affinity for Asian cultures and a high interest in traveling there.
33. Appreciates my other eccentricities. You will discover them as we go. LOL
34. Has no problem taking a shower/bath with a partner.
35. Can appreciate occasionally being "bad."
36. Has a tendency towards non-conformity
37. Not a huge sports spectator enthusiast. I can sit and watch a game now and then, but mostly I would rather be “doing” something.
38. And finally .. I plan to have an elevnty-first (111) birthday party a long itme down the road. I would fully expect you to be able to attend and dance with me.