You know it alwasy seems to happen when I eat a Donut.. I had this beautiful Apple Fritter in my hand, and had just taken the first bite.... I was on my way to the Van Nuys Municipal Court to deal with a Fix It Ticket for Tinted Windows that turned into a court case.... I was enjoying my drive with the sunroof open and the warm California Sunshine on my shoulders... time for a second bite of my Fritter when I pass a small fender bender car accident at the corner of Kestner and Kittridge. I look to see if everyone is okay, but I notice something strange...
I see this White-Grey-White-Grey blurr... I stop and look closer and it's two guys on the ground fighting... well since right there at a High School I figure its just some High School Kids fighting and not that big of a deal.... I honk my horn to get their attention and then I see this silver flash.... it was an aluminum baseball bat, and the guy on top was wailing on the guy on the bottom... he was going for head-shots...
I figure this goes from kids giving eachother bruises to grown men trying to kill someone! Well, I hit my brakes so hard when I realised this was something serious and my precious Fritter slipped out of my hand and smashed into my dashboard. I glance at my broken Fritter on the floorboard and go into action....
I run up to them with my right hip away from them so they don't know if I am armed or not... I was wearing a suit minus the coat, so I was hoping they would think I am an off duty cop or a Detective.. I am barking orders at them, "DROP THE BAT! DROP THE BAT!" They both stand up and the guy with the bat goes into a 'I'm gonne bat your head into left field' posture! Well, this is Fight or Flight time.. I could have retreated and left these two to continue and call 911 (the smart thing to do) or take action.....
I point just to the side of the guy with the bat kind of toward where a car might be coming at him and yell "Look Out!!!" He starts to turn his head and I Bum Rush him... drove my shoulder into his chest and got him down on the ground... I pulled the bat away from him and ran to my car... I locked the bat in my car so at least we're tallking about a less-than lethal situation.
I come back to them and they are still going at it... both tired, looking like they both need an excuse to stop and I give it to them... I pull them apart and order them to the curb... "You sit there, cross your ankles!" You sit there, cross your ankles!"
Time to call 911, as they are both chilling for the moment, but I cant see the screen of my phone because the sun is so strong (1:03 PM) I go back to my car to call 911, and as I am calling, I see the guy who had the bat get up and walk to his car... I come after him.. "You're not going anywhere man!" and he hastens his step... "Give me your keys!" as he gets into his car... well at this point I start thinking about if he has a gun in his car... and if I am gonna continue sticking my neck out anymore, afterall, the guy getting beat with a bat is safe now... and there's the excuse to back off I was looking for... I see out of the corner of my eye that there's a license plate on the ground amongst some other crashed parts.... so I kind of give the guy a 'You're a little punk look' and go for the plate... but it turns out the plate belonged to the guy who was beaten and the guy minus his banged up bat lit up the tires and left in a cloud of smoke.
I ended up almost getting cuffed up by the Police when they get there... we are both at Police Gun-Point, but it's cool.. they are coming on an Assault with a Deadly Weapon call, and they need to make sure everything is cool for their own safety.... the Victim is actually cuffed for a few minutes until I let the Police know that he wasn't the Assailant.
I gave my statement to the Police and got a note from them to excuse me from being late for Court. As I left I saw my precious Apple Fritter... broken into pieces on the floorboard of my car... I really deserved that Fritter... but I think I'll stay away from them for a while, untill I am ready for another crazy day...
Later that afternoon, the Victim's Insurance Company called me and said "On behalf of out Insured, I would like to thank you for saving his life." WOW... you don't get those calls too often and it felt pretty good!
I went home and got ready for the XRCO Awards Show in Hollywood... and sure enough, less than an hour into the event, I end up getting my shirt soaked by a thrown drink... I rush up to see the fight and am asked by the husband of the M.C. of the event to eject the woman who was throwing the drink. Well, I knew the M.C. HAD to stay at the event, and my nice white shirt was soaked in White Wine, so hey... round two... I Bear Hugged the woman and walked her out the door and told Security that she's 86'd per the husband of the M.C. of the event.
The movie "Chemisty Part 1" which was Nominated for 'Best Gonzo Release' didn't win, but if it had, I was to accept the Award on behalf of the Director, Tristen Taoromino since she is still in New York. I was happy to leave after and have sex with my lady-friend... it had been a long day.... did I mention that that morning, I had been wearing a mask in a scene and breathed too much of my own CO2 and passed out for 30 seconds (while having sex!)... yeah.. I have a strange life... it's pretty typical of me... let's see what today has in store for me...
-Jack Lawrence
JackLawrenceXXX.com
