After last night, I have come to the conclusion, that I have more faith in one person who, for the following reasons will be the only one to know what really is going on in my head.
1. HE listens. He doesn't think that thare has to be something "attached" to our friendship, because we have known each other long enough to know what matters.
2. HE treats me like a person which is something many people seem to forget. I am a person who does happen to care and have feelings. My life has never been handed to me on a silver platter. I have rebelled against my parents on more than one occasion, but I learned from those mistakes. I learned that although my life is all complicated it doesn't mean that I was raised to be a wild girl. Nope, I am far from that once again. I had my bad as I can be phase and I learned from that. The only thing that HE hasn't seen is my complete nervous breakdown, I hate myself and my life phase. Ok, I take that back. he has seen the I hate myself and my life phase. Who do you think has helped me out of the depression in the past???
#> HE cleared up things that I had blamed myself for, which how he came to do that I will never know myself. I think with the death of someone that he and I knew, it was something to be able to just say what was on our minds when we talked. That was the thing. I never had to feel like he would contradict me or basically talk down to me. He has shown me more love and support that I technically don't even get from my own husband (You have to know the story behind that later) and there are times when I just need to rant and rave until I feel better. He has always been there for me. Even when I didn't hear from him for over ten years. HE WAS STILL there. He is a big brother, best friend and never forgotten sweetheart. So, this is my blog to the friendship of Colonel_Deckard and myself. Hope this explains more than some will realize or ever know.
