growing up questioning my Parents on why They told me to do something was not allowed. if i questioned my Father, i was arguing and He did not allow any of us to argue with Him or my Mother. Once i turned 18 i had a choice, i could live by His rules, or i could pack my bags and leave. Being fanatically solvent (poor) I really had no choice but to live by His rules.
when my dreams of a track & field scholarship fell apart my senior year and two failed semesters at two JCs i basically gave up on life except i had about 5 girlfriends. Not knowing what to do with myself, i made the mistake of joining the USAF. So after living under my Father's overbearing ways for 20 years i spent 4 years doing what anyone who out ranked me told me to do, because in the military, you don't question why you are doing something, you just do it because you were told to.
after my time in the USAF was done, being married with two boys and no job, W/we moved in with my Parents and my Father's "If you don't want to live by My rules, then pack you bags and get out!" attitude for another 13 plus years. now i'm seporated in debt and unemployed, so i'm still living here and it's still the same.
let me see, 20 + 4 + 13 + 4 = 41 years of doing what I was told to do because I was told to do it, no questions asked.
41 years is a long time to be doing anything, and old habits die-hard!
lil blue fae *jamie*
