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He's gone....

Well, I posted last blog on his bday, lol, he's gone & has been for bout 3 wks I guess...It's been peaceful & the kids really have adjusted well.. they seem like different girls in a way, so much happier. My oldest said she was just glad to not hear the fighting anymore, that broke my heart, my youngest doesn't say anything really. I know they want us together but not if there's the fighting. They love going to his place, guess cuz it's a new plc to them but it breaks my heart that they want to be there so much...I feel like they don't want to be w/me or talk to me, that I'm a failure & it is all my fault. He doesn't tell them that but it is..Sometimes I think I should just go back so everyone else is happy. Anyway, I know it'll take time to adjust to all of this, them being gone, me having a room mate & her son & we do things so differently but are gr8 friends...I also, have someone I care very much about but not sure how he's feeling, sometimes it seems all good then things change so I don't know. I guess it's really to soon to even worry about another man when I'm not divorced yet but he just came into my life & I want him here...Only time will tell....I just hope it tells soon..lol..Well had to vent more...all done for now...lol.... "Never Regret Anything, that once made you smile" I love that quoute, it fits w/so many diff. things in life....Have a great one! :)
Well this is it, what I've been wanting, he leaves next week & moves into his own place. It's been hell here for past few mos & only getting worse & yes it's all my fault but I can't take it anymore...I need my space NOW! Especially after tonight, e were fussing (& I was yelling w/him) & he hit my car w/his hand & put a dent in side that HE has to repair!!He does this crap right in front of kids & I can't get through to him how important it is for them to not be around even if we're just talking b/c they're not stupid & it's affecting them both in different ways!! He apologized as we both said some very hurtful things that I'm not sure can be taken back but only time will tell. Now I have to try & make it here (when I want to go home to TN but want him close to kids & them close to him) financially but do have a room mate & her son, gonna be a lil squeezed in this house but will manage. Anyway, just had to vent!!!
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