Over 16,534,145 people are on fubar.
What are you waiting for?
Sometimes you just know.
Some things, some people are just toxic.
Sometimes those people are you.
Some things, some people are just inherently good.
They bring you nothing but joy.
Sometimes those people are you.
Some things, some people just light up when you touch them.
It's all because you are their light.
Keep it shining for them, you know it's worth it.
Some things, some people are not for you,
and you know this inherently.
Pay attention to your instincts.
They're probably right.
I usually know.
No warning labels required here.
Some days when I attempt to communicate with people close to me (or those I perceive to be close to me), the nonresponsiveness makes me wonder why I bother. Then, I remember...oh yeah, it is not a Bri-centric world. This is where the virtue of patience would play a role and serve me well. Sometimes, even though silence stings worse than the harshest word, it is mostly temporary. It's part of the game of life, I suppose; and silence is best met with reciprocated silence. I just abhor "games." I tell myself to take comfort in the people that you know are on your side, and be grateful for them and their support. I tell myself this all the time. Nevertheless, I am periodically reminded of how explosive my "jump-to-conclusionisms" can be. I do believe that I have moderated everything about myself since my early 30s - including my temperament.
All this to bring a personal observation to the fore. Something that most who have been around the block a time or two will call a "Captain Obvious" observation. The age of the social medium (for me, 1997-present) has been both a blessing and curse. In my advanced age and presumed advanced wisdom, I am leaning towards calling it the latter. I watch with rubberneck speed as people come and go, relationships are forged and disposed of, "real-life" relationships are ruined because obsessive fantasy ones are begun on forums like this one, and patience is at a premium when your good friend or significant other is over one thousand miles away. So what do a good portion of those people in those situations do? They bail. Relationships have become more disposable than ever before, and when I look at my own parents - who just celebrated their fiftieth (that's 50th) wedding anniversary (and RENEWED THEIR VOWS) - it makes me sad. I wasn't raised to dispose of friends. I wasn't raised to be disposed of. I am extremely loyal to the point of enduring gross betrayal - no matter the intimacy level of the relationship. Have I bailed on people before? Of course, I have. I've never professed to be perfect, and as I have become fond of saying, "I am not Jesus Christ." But my own hypocrisy pales in comparison to the good I've brought to people in my life. I hold my head up high and people I've known well for the better part of a decade will tell you, I'm one loyal dude. And these are people who have never hugged me or shook my hand. They're people I've stuck by through forums like this and maybe a telephone line - and nothing else. I won't abandon you out of boredom. It takes a lot to deserve my silence. And if you choose to remain silent upon receiving communication from me, I'll remain. Just remember: For some of us, silence stings worse than the harshest word. And I'll try my damndest not to take it personally, and make it Bri-centric. Just to be clear, this is about no one in particular. It's something on my mind, and mostly an exercise in self-discipline. Remember, this world is not you-centric either. *walks away singing a Carly Simon tune we all know* ~BA
