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Sister Mary was truly a religious woman. Besides for her duties as a nun, she was also very active in various hospitals visiting sick patients and taking care of all their needs. So it was no surprise that one day when she ran out of gas, the only container she could find to put the gas into was a bedpan. Sister Mary happily walked two blocks to the closest gas station filled up the bedpan with gas and headed back to her car. Luck would have it that as Sister Mary started tipping the gas into the fuel tank, the traffic light turned red and she had quite a large audience witnessing the spectacle. Just when she finished pouring in the last drops of gas a fellow opened up his window and hollered, “I swear! If that car starts I’m becoming a religious man!”
You don't know Jack!
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? we find ourselves at a loss when someone says, "you don't know Jack Schitt"
Well thanks to my genealogy efforts you can now respond in an intellectual way...
Jack Schitt is the only son to Awe Schitt..
Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, who married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They had one son, Jack..
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. the deeply religious couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt..
Against her parents objections, Deep Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out..
After being married 15-years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced..
Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock, and because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.. She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock..
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt..
Two of the other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony..
The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens nuptials..
The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Horse..
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world... He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt..
Now when someone says "you don't know Jack Schitt" you can correct them..
