Nematodes, fruit flies and decomposing vegetation. Yes, I am currently studying fruit flies trying to find out about their extra sensory scent sensors. I only have to open a vino tinto and they are on my drink like flies on a cow pat. Well we don’t have a cow but the mess of packing cases belies that fact. Anyway, back to the fruit flies. How on earth do they find me when I pour said drink out in the kitchen and walk all the way to the study to sit and quaff whilst making telephone calls. One phone call over and there it is, waving and wandering around the glass area.
Oh, I found out about the book jackets and they are on the press at the moment so should hopefully be despatched tomorrow or Thursday. I hope so because we are off on Saturday and they will have to wait a long time for payment if they post it afterwards. It is a shame they did not ask for monies up front then there would not have been the worry. It is a shame they did not report the fact that they could not open the file with the copy jacket on. That took a call from my marketing Manager to discover after which she sent another copy which they were able to open. Good job she rang them or we would possibly still be waiting.
Ah, yesterday was an achievement not the day itself but the happenings of the day. I received a cheque from the book company who reside on the East Coast of England, you know, the ones who could not answer one of three emails or confirm receipt of books or answer a straight forward letter. I was rather pleased that they sent the cheque not for the monies involved because that was only £9.00 but the fact that they actually paid on a pro-forma invoice sent with books and letter without quibbling. That sort of discount was well below the 60% a book distribution company would normally take. I suppose it is such a pittance amount that they must have felt sorry for me. Pah. Anyway, as I said, I was chuffed at that for the aforementioned reasons.
Now back to fruit flies. He is conspicuous by his absence and I think maybe my vino tinto is too full of body for him. Well, I cleared all the work surfaces with cleaner and chucked any vestige of rotting vegetation or anything that remotely resembled organic matter in the hope that it would distract them or what ever it is fruit flies do when there is no matter to lay their eggs on.
I was looking to see if they have a heightened sense of smell to find sweet smelling matter or whatever it is that attracts them. And as I sit here I am being driven fruit bat mad by he who has no sense of smell or high density hearing because his pesky screen is giving off high pitched noises. Ah, maybe that is why pesky fruit fly has buzzed off because he could not stand the sound with the smell. Maybe then my vino tinto has a secret signal given off at a frequency too high or low for human ears but fine for fruit flies.
As for nematodes, well they apparently eat fruit flies on worm owners worms. They eat the larvae of the flies and help the worms thrive or something equally as nature intended to keep my attention earthed. I don’t even know what a nematode looks like as it is not the sort of thing you would come across whilst walking along, well maybe in town because there are some very strange sights to behold there. Seeing as I am quite mad enough I drew the line at GoGooing nematodes – well not many people GoGoo over fruit flies except those who wish to know about evolution. Yes they help in the comprehension of evolution although I don’t know why and don’t particularly give a nematode about the whole worm boring subject.
Oh, the jam jar with holes in a lid of plastic film and some sticky water seems to be the most eco-friendly answer to picking them off like flies because I am heartily sick of cleaning windows following a mass swatting session. No, it is not that bad, it is just that they seem to be psychic and when there is one on the outside kitchen window looking at me washing up, as soon as I pick up the manky cloth, specially put aside for these yuk jobs, the pesky fly goes off somewhere safe. They land again and I swat them, miss them and try again – all this time the window is beaten to death with a damp cloth and now needs a wash.
You can follow where they are providing they are against a white background or even a window but as soon as they hit the coloured bits in the room there is no chance. After they hit a blind spot they seem to disappear into obscurity which is where I wish they would stay then I would not have to go Googo over them because it is enough to make me gaga.
On a different subject my friend Moon from India sent me a FaceAge message asking me to find the credentials or kosher status of a correspondence college. It took ages after being sent all over the country but in the end it was OK for him. The thing that surprised me was the cost and his ability to cover it. He seems to have more money than incense to burn and I am delighted for him. However, I am not sure where he gets his compeetoes because the average wage in India is not stunning, maybe he sells nematodes as a side line because that seems a loocrative business.
Ah well, it is time for the worm to turn and do some packing then some pecking because for one the suitcase is there in the chair hinting that it needs filling and my stomach is declaring that it needs filling. Oh, actually the suitcase is an open rather than shut one and is filled with all manner of rubbish for me to put into order including toilet paper but I refuse to pack the toilet brush. Yes, we usually take one but that is when we are staying in an apartment for the duration and not doing a guided tour. Can you imagine me re-packing the brush after each room evacuation? Goodness, there would be more than fruit flies and nematodes to worry about. And on that rather lavatorial subject it is time to fill the belly then the case and the rest can do itself
