So, your love life is stuck in a rut and you cannot figure out what happened. Well, I'll bet you're thinking one of a few things:
1: "Love life in marriage just gets dull. Period. There's nothing anyone can do about it."
2: "Maybe my wife/husband doesn't love me anymore."
3: "I just cannot perform well enough in bed."
4: "Maybe he/she is cheating on me and just lost interest."
99 times out of 100, none of those things are true. So, what's the problem then?
Perhaps you forgot how to be you. You forgot how to live life. You forgot how to communicate verbally and physically.
I can tell you right now the key to sizzling sheets is affection, attention, and learning to read your loved one's body language. After having learned to read it, that is when you learn to do the other two things: to give and receive affection and attention.
A good general rule is that if mommy is happy, daddy is happy. And if both are happy, then so are the kids. Not always, but the majority of the time that saying rings true.
So many people go through life with their eyes closed, their ears turned off to everything around them. They aren't living life; they merely exist.
I want you to do me a favor. It isn't a big favor, I promise.
Here's what I want you to do:
I want you to get up and go look at your loved ones wherever they are. Take a close look at them - really close. Now, close your eyes and picture your life without them; picture them gone for good, never to come back.
Wow.
All those petty little arguments over who ate all the leftovers, who stole the paper, who forgot to check the oil, who left dirty socks out and didn't finish their homework – seem pretty petty, huh?
You probably want to hug them don't you?
Well, go do it! Just what is it that you're waiting for?
You never know when you may lose them; tomorrow may indeed never come. I can tell you, the last words you ever want to say to someone is 'I love you'.
So, tell them that, too.
Go on. Do it. You said you'd do me that favor.
Now, let's talk about other things.
I'll bet you when you get home from work you walk right up to the door, pull out your keys, perhaps grab the mail, unlock the door and walk right inside.
Am I right?
I'll bet so.
Now, let me tell you what you've missed during that brief walk inside your home.
You've missed the birds chirping in the background, the geese making sounds overhead as they travel south for the winter; the sun, and the way it glistens on the horizon, the crimson reds, golden yellows, and fiery oranges; the feel of the cool air blowing across your cheek; the smell of leaves burning in the ditches at your neighbor's, and the approaching train rumbling beneath your feet.
Now that you are inside, I'll bet you toss your keys down, let out a long sigh of relief that it's Friday, and shout out, "What's for dinner?"
Instead, why don't you go sneak up behind your lover in the kitchen, turn her around with force and kiss the heck out of her. Tell her you love her with everything you've got and everything you're ever going to have.
Then, go upstairs and talk with your kiddos. Ask 'em how school went, take 'em outside and wrestle with them.
Watch their smiles, their faces lit up with joy and love… for you, their daddy.
When you're done, go in the dining room, hand-in-hand, say grace and eat as a family. Don't forget to crack a joke or two and kiss mommy while you're at it. Let the kids see how much you love their one-and-only.
That's right, eat as a family, and give thanks to God for everything you've taken for granted thus far. Don't sit in front of the TV laughing at Archie Bunker. Go sit next to your wife and laugh at your kids slurping up their spaghetti, their faces already a mess.
Let me ask you a question:
What do you see when you walk into your living room?
I'll bet you see the entertainment center, the TV, couches and chairs, perhaps some knickknacks scattered about.
What about the bible with its worn pages sitting on the coffee table, the candles lit at its side? How about the pictures your kids made just for you hanging above the couch, tape and all? How about your wedding pictures over the fireplace… Remember how happy you were to take her as your own? Remember all those things about her that made you fall head over heels in love?
…Those things are still very much a part of her, whether you see them or not.
Never take for granted anything. If you do, you can bet others will take you for granted and, most importantly, so will life. It'll pass by in a blink of an eye. After all, you only get once chance to enjoy it, and all of your loved ones in it. You get one chance to do the right thing.
You can either live or exist. It is a choice made by you, not those around you. If you have eyes to see with, see. If you have ears to hear with, hear.
-Law
